Instagram ▷ Kian Lawley

2.9

Neveah

"So what was that thing between you and Meredith?" Kian said, fixing up his suit for Sam's wedding. He looked at me and gave me a knowing look.

I looked back and shrugged my shoulders. I honestly didn't care what he thought of the argument that Meredith and I had over instagram. I get it, it was stupid but I wasn't going to let her talk to me any kind of way. I wasn't the one who posted that post on instagram. It was Kian. At the end of the day, she should've talked to her supposedly "boyfriend" and not come after me.

"Neveah, you shouldn't have fought with her like that."

Wait, now he's blaming this on me?

I furrowed my brow and gave him a confused look. "Wait," I said, pausing. "You're blaming this on me? This isn't my fault! You were the one who posted that picture of me and wrote that stupid caption! You were the one who she should've talked to. Not me. You are the one who is cheating on your girlfriend and I'm put in the middle of this. You can't have your cake and pie at the same time. You have to pick one and if you're going to pick her, then tell me. Because I don't need you wasting me time," I said, on the verge of tears. "You wasted my time from the day we met. You ruined me and I didn't trust anyone for two whole years. And now your back and I'm not trying to waste anymore time. So before you try to fix my broken heart, I'm going to break yours. Even if you chose me, I wouldn't choose you back. You had two years to fix me and all of a sudden, you want me back? That's not how it works. So I hope you attend this wedding, thinking about how it could've been me walking down the aisle and us getting married."

Kian looked at me and stared. I looked back and I saw his glossy eyes as tears started to make a trail down his cheeks.

"You wouldn't choose m-me back?" He questioned, his voice quiet and wavering as he talked.

I looked away and closed my eyes. I couldn't believe the fact that I'm making him cry. The wedding is supposed to start on a few minutes and I am making one of the best men cry.

Take a deep breath, Neveah. Just take a deep breath.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

I give Kian one last look before walking out of the room, making my way towards Rosa's room. I enter and Rosa is standing in front of me with a white veil that trails towards down the back of her dress and a flower crown adoring her face. I notice it was made with the same flowers as her bouquet, which matched her dress perfectly.

I stare at her and I smile. "If Sammy boy wasn't marrying you, I would've," I say in a joking manner.

She laughs and then looks at me with worried eyes. "I look okay right? Like there's no stains or no lipstick stains on my teeth? Oh my gosh, I'm so nervous. I haven't even prepared my vows yet and I have to walk down the aisle in 5 minutes! And my dad! Where in the hell is my dad? He has to walk me down the aisle! This wedding is ruined! Oh my gosh Neveah we need to find him because I can't do this with-"

I put my hands on her shoulders and let out a nervous laugh. "Chill out, Rosa. You got this. The love of your life is out there waiting for you at the alter. And your dad is waiting for you at the door that leads to the aisle. Don't worry, he's here! And for the vows, just speak from your heart. I know you love Sam and I know you have a way with words. If you can't say it in words, express it in that kiss you guys will share afterwards. He's the love of your life and you guys are finally getting married. And then we'll have little Rosa's and Sammy's running around soon."

She lets out a relieved sigh about her father and stares at me. Sheraises her eyebrow and gives me a confused look. "Why don't you ever take your own advice?"

Her question throws me off guard and it takes me a minute to comprehend what she just says. "What do you mean?" I ask.

She puts her bouquet down and guides me to sit in the chair. She stays standing and she starts pacing back and forth. "Why don't you ever take your own advice? You give really good advice to people but you never give yourself good advice."

"What are you talking ab-"

Oh.

I give her a knowing look and I sigh. "Are you talking about Kian?"

She smiles and starts getting all excited. "Yes! Yes! That's exactly who I'm talking about! Why won't you accept him back? You make it seem like he's a bad guy and all but-"

"Rosa... He broke up with me just because he thought I was cheating. Even when I tried to tell him I wasn't, he wouldn't believe me," I said, pointing to the wall like he was standing right there. "His friends were only friends with me because we were together and they all dissed me after we broke up! Are you really trying to defend him right now?"

"No! I'm not trying to defend him! What I'm trying to say is you love him. You love him so much and you won't let yourself accept the fact that you love him. Yes, I agree. He has don't some pretty messed up things but everyone makes mistakes. You guys have been through ups and downs even though you guys weren't together for that long. You guys have been through everything together and maybe that's a sign. Every time you guys fight, you cry. Every time you talk to Jc, you cry. Every time you think about Kian, you get depressed and in a shitty mood because you love him. You just won't accept it because you're scared you might get hurt again. But I'm asking you to do me a favor. Please forgive him. Please accept the love you have for him because we accept the love we think we deserve and right now, you're not accepting any and that's not what you deserve."

I stare at Rosa. "Maybe I don't deserve him."

Rosa shakes her head. "Bullshit. You deserve everything, Neveah. You deserve the good and the bad. We all do. That's the thing with life. There's good and bad things and they always come our way. Just accept the fact that you love him because I know for damn sure that he loves you too."
I smile back. She was right. I sit here and I mope around every time I think of him. I can't do that anymore. It's time to live my life and I want to do that with Kian by my side. I look at Rosa and wrap my arms around her.

"Thank yo-"

"Hey! What are you guys doing? The wedding is starting," the photographer says, opening the door without knocking.

"First off, you didn't knock, which was quite rude. Secondly, oh my gosh, the wedding! Go Rosa, go!" I say, giving her the bouquet and pushing her out of the room. I follow her and I enter the reception to sit down in the first row. Kian looks at me and gives me a small smile, and I give one back.

Even though he hurt my feelings and shit, I don't care.

Because I love Kian Lawley and that's never going to change.

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-Bilinxi🌹

Please read
Sorry that I haven't updated in a while. Even though it is summer break, I've been busy. I'm working non-stop and I am so tired. I've been kind of sleeping. Every time k go to sleep, I can't sleep for long. Or there have been times I try to go to sleep but I can't. I really don't know what's going on but I'm trying my best because I really want to get this book finished. It's just I don't have the inspiration that I had in the beginning of this book but I'm going to try my best to finish it.

I'm also going to cut this book short. It has maybe 3 more chapters to it and after that, it will be finished. I hate that it has to be cut short, but like I said, no inspiration.

I hope you guys have a good summer and I hope you guys like this book. In my opinion, this book is shitty but most people don't think it is, which I appreciate. Have fun reading!
-Bilinxi🌹(Alexus)