Downfall [Punk Niall Horan]

60

*Five Months Later*

I watched Harry's still figure quietly, like I had for all these days and months that I had been by his side.

My hand was latched onto his unmoving one like I always did, and it was so cold to the touch like always. His long eyelashes fanned over his sunken cheeks, and I tried my best not to look at the tube down his throat because I knew I was the whole reason he couldn't breathe on his own now. But even saying that, by now I had gotten used to seeing his basically dead figure even though he wasn't dead at all.

I constantly watched the heart monitor screen, thinking that at any moment it was going to make that horrible flat lining noise. Yet I had been doing that for months now and it didn't happen. Permanent bags were underneath my eyes because I hardly got any sleep anymore, but I didn't care about myself anymore. I was fine, but Harry wasn't. He needed me, and I think he has gotten better.

I smiled at him even though he couldn't see me. "Hey, H. I'm still here, right beside you. I know you can do this, you're so so strong," I laughed slightly, and then looked down to my  protruding stomach that held my little baby inside. "You can kinda see the kid growing inside me now," I giggled, laying my free hand on top of my stomach.

Then I looked back up to Harry and squeezed his hand, "It's a girl." I smiled giddily, feeling her prominently inside my stomach now, and then thinking about her father, "Niall is freaking out, as usual, like a fucking lunatic. He doesn't know how to handle this. He misses your guidance and you too, you know? We all do. Even my little girl does, she misses the sweet words you used to whisper to her and the kisses you used to give her."

Happy tears welled up in my eyes as I looked back at Harry and felt like he was actually talking back to me, "Nia has been talking to Niall and giving him some tips on how to be more gentle, and how to handle me and our girl. He's doing okay I suppose, but he doesn't know how to change a damn diaper to save his life. It's quite comical actually."

I sniffled and let go of Harry's hand, leaning back to get a full view of him like I always did, "I miss you too, so much. Everyday is a struggle, but I know you're going to get better eventually. You need me, we need each other. That's how we made it our whole lives, right? It's no different, because we actually weren't together for 8 years, and I thought you were dead."

I laughed hysterically and hunched forward to rest my elbows on my knees, my spine curving away from the back of the chair, "Look at how far we've come, H." I sighed and looked outside to the world that was actually safe now, "We saved so many innocent people, and we saved the world pretty much. Remember when we used to pretend to be superheroes together? Well, we actually were for once. The world is going to be a better place because of us now. We all made sacrifices, but look what it has gotten us."

The machines whirred an answer back like always, but I imagined Harry smiling widely back at me with shining green eyes that were so alive and vibrant. I'd do anything just to see his eyes and smile just one more time. "My baby can actually be safe now, well as safe as she can be in a world full of fucking crazy people. I hate to admit we didn't destroy all of the bad, but we destroyed a good bit. And I say that's better than none. The world's a little bit safer now because of us, and I can't help but feel pride in that after all we've gone through," I said lowly, having a whirlwind of memories twirl through my head that was the clearest it had ever been since Nia gave me her advice that I took very seriously.

"I guess you can thank Nia for me being actually happy right now despite the circumstances, because without her I'd be a complete, useless mess that is a wreck over your situation right now. I'd be no help to anyone, or you especially. And you're my main priority, H. I think I'm going to name my baby after her daughter, Violetta, that passed away. I think it's the only way I can give back to her. Nia deserves it so much," I said with a small smile, knowing that Harry had always wanted me to be so happy. I knew he would be proud of me for this choice, but of course I had to ask Niall and Nia first.