Prussia x Reader ft OC
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'I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted
I thought about our last kiss, how it felt, the way you tasted
And even though your friends tell me you're doing fine.'
I still thought about (Y/N). I was currently driving by places that I used to take her to and we used to get wasted there. The last kiss I had with her. It felt so soft and full of love. She tasted like peppermint. I stopped and decided to call Andrea she was both of our friends. "Hey." I greeted once she had picked up. Andrea was like (Y/N)'s sister. "What's up Gilbert?" she asked me accent ringing clear with every word. It was a different kind from Arthur.
"Is she okay?" I asked about (Y/N). I wanted to know how she was taking the break up despite it being her decision. "She's doing fine." responded the Australian girl. I hung up. Every time I asked her friends, it was always the same answer, 'she's doing fine'. Maybe I wanted her to feel bad. I honestly don't know anymore.
'Are you somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you?
When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote you?'
Were you out there feeling like you were by yourself (Y/N)? Despite him being next to you do you feel alone? When you get into those horrid arguments and he says something that hurts you. Do you read those words that I wrote down on paper just for you? Do you read those words?
'Sometimes I start to wonder was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?
'Cause I'm not fine at all.'
I had driven myself back home and sat with Gilbird on the pillow beside me. It got me thinking. Was our whole relationship just a lie? Was all those happy memories just a hoax? If our whole relationship was real, if it really wasn't just me having an emotional attachment to you, how could you be fine? I felt the familiar sting of the tears. I want to know because I'm not fine at all.
'I remember the day you told me you were leaving
I remember the make-up running down your face
And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I can never escape
'Cause I'm not fine at all.'
That day that you told me you were leaving played in my mind over and over again. The make up was running down your face from the tears. You left so many dreams behind with me just because you didn't need them. Like every single wish we had made when we saw a shooting star or we wished on 11:11.
Want to know my new wish? I wished that I could wake up tomorrow with amnesia. I wished to forget about the stupid little things about you... about us. Like the way it felt to fall asleep after a long day next to you. You'd whisper to me little conversations that were just for us and no one else. There are many memories that I can never escape. They're all about you. Want to know why I can't get rid of them (Y/N)? Cause I'm not fine at all.
'The pictures that you sent me they're still living in my phone
I'll admit I like to see them, I'll admit I feel alone
And all my friends keep asking why I'm not around.'
I scrolled through picture after picture that you had sent me. Some of them of us and some of them were just of you that you knew I liked. They were still living in my phone despite our break up. I'll admit to you or anyone that I like to see them. I'll admit that I feel so alone without you here. While I was on my phone I had a new message from Mathias and all my other friends asking why I'm not going out with them or around.
'It hurts to know you're happy, yeah, it hurts that you've moved on
It's hard to hear your name when I haven't seen you in so long.'
I finally went out and our shared friend Andrea was there. She was sympathetic towards me and gave me a hug. It's like she knows just what to do and what the pain is like. "Hey, where's (Y/N)?" asked Alfred. It was like he was saying an insult to me. It's very hard to hear your name being said when I haven't seen you since that day. My heart aches knowing that you're happy. It hurts that you've moved on from me.
'It's like we never happened, was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?
'Cause I'm not fine at all.'
I knew how this was for you. You had deleted my number, deleted everything that was about us. It was like we never happened in the first place. Like all those dates, kisses and times together never existed. Was everything you told me and did just a lie? Was the relationship a lie? If it was as real as it had been for me then how could you be like this? How could you be fine?
Andrea nudged me and sent me a look as if to ask me if I was okay. I wanted to say yes. That would be a lie. 'Cause I'm not fine at all.
'I remember the day you told me you were leaving
I remember the make-up running down your face
And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them
Like every single wish we had made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape.'
I sat with Andrea, she told me that talking about it helps. She's always there for the both of us. "I remember her leaving Andrea. I remember the make-up running down her face. She left behind all those dreams because she didn't need them. Like all the wishes we made together." I sputtered out. Andrea sat there patiently letting me get it all out.
"I wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid little things between us. Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to someone else. Next to her. I want to forget about the memories I never can escape." I said trying to hold back the tears. Andrea pulled me into a hug. It doesn't even start to compare to yours. Yours were special, made me feel like I was your whole world.
'If today I woke up with you right beside me
Like all of this was just some twisted dream
I'd hold you closer than I ever did before
And you'd never slip away
And you'd never hear me say.'
If I awoke from this slumber to see you right beside me. Like it was all some twisted dream that I had. I'd hold you closer to me than I ever did before. And you'd never slip away from me like you did. And you'd never hear me say....
'I remember the day you told me you were leaving
I remember the make-up running down your face
And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape.'
I remember every single bit of that day and it haunts me. It taunts me that you're not here with me. It was a heart breaking sight to see you with make-up running down your face. You left all the dreams we used to talk about since you didn't need them. Like all those wishes we ever made together. I wish I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid little things like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you. And the memories I never can escape.
I hate feeling like this. When you were sleeping soundly next to me and as I fell asleep I felt whole. I felt that fuzzy feeling you get when you would've saw the perfect ending to a movie.
' 'Cause I'm not fine at all
No, I'm really not fine at all
Tell me this is just a dream
'Cause I'm not fine at all.'
Tell me everything that's happening is just a dream. I'm not fine about our break up. I'm not fine about why you were leaving. I'm not fine about you being with another man or that you had moved on so easily. Cause I'm not fine at all...
