Thy Letters

Prologue

Prologue

"Can I talk to you for a second?" I scream at the top of my voice, since it's really loud inside.

"Yeah! Sure." He turns towards me with a smile on his face.

That smile is enough to get my heart into overdrive.

But the beats of the music almost drowns the constant thump-thump in my ears.

"Not in here. Let's go outside. I don't want to be screaming at you while I tell you, what I'm going to tell you." I say loudly.

He smiles and wraps his arm around my shoulders as we head outside.

The cool air hits me making me shiver. I wrap my arms around myself. Noticing this he takes off his jacket and puts it around my shoulders. I can smell him on the jacket and it somewhat relieves me.

It's sometime after one at night. And even-though the party had been going on for a good six to seven hours, people were still dancing to the loud music. All because of the courtesy of Jack's neighbours, who had been kind enough to not call the police yet. After all it was the end of the sophomore year party. It's kind of a tradition in this town. So while the seniors and juniors get to go to prom we have a sophomore party, just like we had the freshman year end party.

While here I am, ready to spill the beans to Aaron and confess my love for him after almost a year's contemplation and distress and heated debates with the one close girl-friend I have.

And to be honest, I am scared. Scared off the thought he might reject me.

What scares me more is that things would get strange between us to an extent that he would start avoiding me and then he would stop talking to me.

I am scared to lose him.

"You wanted to tell me something Jess?"

I look up at him. "Yeah. I do." I say and breathe in deeply trying relax my nerves and to gather all my courage and to put what I am feeling into words. And that too, the right ones. "We've been best friends for nearly ten years now."

"I know, right." His eyes brighten uo. "Ten years . Seems like yesterday and a lifetime ago as well." He sighs. "It's been so long and we're going to be juniors. Two years more and we'll be off to college." He licks his lips and I look away.

"Yeah. Right. So I was saying that lately, no not lately, since a long time now, I started to develop these feelings for you. The kind of feelings one has for someone who is definitely more than a friend. And I have had a lot of time to think about the feelings I have for you." I pause. This is it. Here you go. "And I... I... I think, no, I'm sure that I'm in love with you Aaron. More than a friend and more than as a best friend." I let out the air I hadn't realised I had been holding in.

I wait for him to reply. Hoping that he would say that he loved me too or at least liked me too. But he keeps on looking at me with this look that I cannot get myself to describe.

We stand in silence for a long. And then I get impatient ."Say something , Aaron. Say anything."

He looks at me and purses his lips." I don't know what to say. I mean I love you. I do-"

" But?" There always is. Isn't there?

"But not more than a friend." He starts pacing in front of me. "Never more than a friend." He stops and looks at me.

" Oh!" I try to hold back the tears which are threatening to spill from my eyes. "I get. I get. Lets just forget what I said ." I step closer to him but he shifts back."Let's go back to being BFF's and forget that this ever happened."

He licks his teeth. The way he always does when he is angry. "You think we'll ever be the same now Jesse?" He grabs my shoulders ."It's never going to happen. You've ruined everything Jesse." He shakes his head and steps away from me."I'm going back inside." Saying so he disappears inside the house.

I can't make out the words of the song anymore and my head starts to ache. I sit down on the pavement and the tears follow.

I sit there for a minute or an hour maybe, wishing that somehow I can undo what I did.

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