[Dec. 10, 2019 #1 in JBFF]
The bad boys always want the good girl to be bad for them but what happends when the bad girl wants the good boy to be bad just for her?
"You are way too good," she said to me.
"Way too good?" I asked, raising my eyebrow...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
In my life, I fucked up a lot of times but I surely never ever fucked up as badly as I did this time. I had never dealt with girls before so I didn't know the different levels of hurting them but I guess the way I hurt Loyce this afternoon was a very high level on that scale.
I couldn't believe that all this happened and that I had hurt Loyce so much that she didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore.
It was never my intention to do something that would hurt her so much. I knew that I did some things behind her back that I didn't want her to ever find out but I guess it's true that the truth can't be always hidden and in my case everything came out the way I didn't want it to and in the process it hurt one of the most special people to me.
Karma is a bitch and it got me very good this time. I honestly deserved this for all the shit that I did and that I put Loyce through.
Judging by her reaction, I could tell that she saw me more than just a friend with benefits and I didn't know that I was hurting her because I had no idea that she saw me that way.
If I had known I wouldn't have let anything like this happen, in fact it would all be different right now.
How should I have known? Loyce never gave me any signs that she liked me that way, ever. She was very affectionate and loving and she cared about me a lot but it was always in a friendship kind of way and never more than that. I mean at some point I would've noticed if things were changing because she would've changed her behavior towards me but she was always the same and that's why I was even more confused now that I knew that she saw things differently.
I wish she would've told me. I mean she was the one who said that as soon as one of us caught feelings we would stop the friends of benefits thing and talk everything out. Sure, I had feelings for her too but that was long before we started that agreement and at that time I already knew that she didn't want anything serious because she told me herself so I was just happy to have something with her at all.
Maybe I should've tried harder. Maybe I should've convinced her that I could be a good boyfriend to her and that she wouldn't make a mistake by dating me. Maybe that would've been the right thing to do but now it was too late to think about the things that I should've done.
I needed to do something about this situation. I needed to talk to her right now and that's why I was on my way to her apartment. I had to make things right with her and tell her that I didn't care about any other girl and that she was the only one I really wanted to be with.
