The sound of sobs filled the cometary as I watched the casket which heled my used to be best friend get lowered down into a 6ft deep hole. A single tear escaped from my eye as flash backs of her ran through my mind along with questions. Anger started filling up inside me. Hatred for the world.. and.. Hatred for myself..
"She's in a better place now Alex.." I turned my attention to the mother of my dead friend who was crying and nodded.
"Ya.. I hope so..." I looked down clenching my fists. She placed her hand on my shoulder.
"Hey.. if you need anything you can come to us. we will still treat you like our son." She gave a week smile. "and if you need to let anger out maybe write letters to no one. it helps."
I nodded and sighed as she walked away. does that actually work? I asked in my mind.
when I walked to the home of my foster family I tried to walk to my room but my foster mom stopped me.
"how was the party?" she asked smiling. she doesn't know i went to a funeral. she never liked Clair. no clue why.
"it was fine..." I walked passed her and walked into my room without thinking I slammed the door and laid on my bed finally starting to cry. this pain.. i'm not used to this.. what is this plain? I curled up into the tightest ball I could manage. then the words from Lilly popped into my mind.
"if you need to let anger out maybe write letters to no one." I remember wondering if that worked so I sat up and grabbed paper and a pencil and tapped my pencil along the paper trying to think.
My dearest friend
its me. I am not mad at what you did but I am hurt and confused. Why did you do it? how much pain were you in? what could I have done to help? what were the signs... and why didn't I see them..? you hurt a lot of people today. but I can't blame you. I mean. I would have done the same if I felt the pain you did. this is gonna sound weird but I already miss you so damn much. watching you be lowered down into that hole I felt something broke inside me.
I will always miss you.
YOU ARE READING
Letters to my dearest friend
Espiritualmy dearest friend. I miss you. what's it like up in the sky? are the people up there finally nice to you? because down here they still talk shit. they don't see they pain they caused you... not get at least.
