Today I had decided to quit my job. I began to feel depressed, held down from everything I wanted to do. My mind was cluttered and I couldn't do it anymore.
I had always been very logical with my money, never treating myself or spending it on unnecessary items. I bargain shopped, the only expensive name brand things I owned being presents from Cole.
I also had quite a bit of my 3 million dollar inheritance left, meaning I could spare to take a break from work and try to find a new way.
Everything was changing, the seasons, my relationship with my best friend, my career, my emotions and my sister even got a serious boyfriend.
Cole has been gone for 2 months now, myself not having time to visit him even once. It was odd, having the person you've spent almost every day with not there. We texted at least once a day, little conversations. We'd skype around once every two weeks.
I had been spending a lot of time with my sister, finding myself there for days on end. I felt lonely in my apartment with only my cat.
My grandmother had died, leaving an impact more on Lily than myself. We had a funeral and visited her grave every two weeks, but it never brought me sadness. I cried when I first heard the news, but it didn't stick with me.
Lily lived with her, being with her everyday and caring for her. I loved my grandmother, but not as much as I loved my mother. Being with my grandmother gave me a feeling of lost time with my mom.
Lily was always with her boyfriend or me, not being able to be alone. She was adjusting to her new circumstances roughly.
I haven't thought much about what I wanted Cole and I to be. It was hard not being able to see him face to face. Plus I didn't know what he wanted us to be.
I mean he didn't say he had thought about kissing me. So that meant he wanted to be more than friends right? Or did it just mean he wanted to hook up. And even if he did want to kiss me, that didn't mean he liked it.
I was confused, knowing I needed to see Cole as soon as possible. I booked a ticket to surprise him tomorrow, but I felt bad leaving my sister behind.
I walked out onto my balcony, finding my sister smoking a cigarette. I grabbed it from her mouth and threw it over the balcony.
"Hey! What the fuck, Ember!" She yelled, looking to me with her tired eyes and pale skin.
"Don't you know that'll kill you."I quoted Cole, using a more serious tone than he did.
"You smoke." She popped off, rolling her eyes and turning back to the night sky.
"I'm leaving tomorrow, Lily." I said bluntly, not knowing how to explain I didn't want her smoking when I did.
She turned to me, her face representing shock. She pulled the blanket she had over her shoulders more, the night air chilling her. "What? Why? To where?" She hurried out.
"I need to go see Cole, Lily. We have something to talk about." I sighed. I tucked a piece of hair, that had fallen from my bun, behind my ear.
"You're gonna leave me alone for Cole?! What's so important that you need to talk to him about, Ember?! What's more important than your mourning sister?!" She defended, standing up so she could get a better view of my face.