Chapter 6

19 0 5
                                    

I woke up the next morning and sighed. Big suprise. Another migraine. I stumbled out of bed and walked into my moms room.

"Mama. Mama wake up." i jostled her shoulder.

'What?" she asked half awake.

"I have another headache. Can i take medicine.?" i asked, rubbing my temple.

"Carson. You can't take medicine everyday! " She just woke up,but didnt waste anytime in making me feel bad. "Its not healthy. "

"MOM. I KNOW THAT!" i took a deep breath. "Im sorry. It just hurts. Please can i just take it?"

"Fine. Whatever." she said and rolled over. I walked into her bathroom and grabbed a small orange pill. Before i swalled it i said," Someday i wont need you. I will stop hurting my body."

I  finished getting ready. I put my hair in a side braid. I cut my hair a few months ago, so the braid doesn't stay on my shoulder very well. Then i pulled on my favorite pants and a navi blue polo. For breakfast i had a bagel and nutella.  When i got to school, Elsa ran up to me. 

"Carson Carson Carson!!!!" 

"What?" i asked, grumpily. My brain doesn't function until 8:00 plus my head hurt. 

"MR. Poehls saw the video. He called Jesy"s parents and she was suspended for a week for profanity and what not!!"

"Elsa, first of all, nobody says what not. And second, give me a drink of your coffee. " i said, stealing the cup from her hand. She made a pouty face. 

"Seriously Carson. Why aren't you excited? Isn't this what you wanted?" she asked, stealing it back. 

"Yes. Of course it is but can we just drop it. Please." i said and opened my locker. 

"why? Come on get excited!" she said, grabbing my hands and doing a little dance. 

"Elsa just STOP!!" i yelled. Everybody looked over at us. 

"Fine. God Carson. Lighten up." she walked back over to her locker. 

In homeroom i just laid my head down. Avery was gone today and i really needed to talk to her about my daydreams.  Either Jesy is in them or i am in pain. Not exactly my best dreams. Elsa really doesnt understand. (Sorry Sophie :) but you dont like 5sos)

By the end of 2nd period, my headache was gone but the feeling of dread took its place. The medicine i take for my headaches isnt meant for everyday use. Maybe once or twice a week , but i take it up to 5 times a week year round. And if i dont stop, my liver might fail. 

When it was lunch time, i made my way to our table. I sat down and started to talk to my friend Hailey. Elsa walked in a few minutes later and she sat down. Without making eye contact with me, we did our daily food trading. 

"Listen Elsa. Im sorry about this morning. I had a headache and i wa.." 

She cut me of, " You see Carson, thats the thing. You use headaches as an excuse for everything. Everybody has problems, but you make such a big deal out of yours."

"I know Els.." 

"No. You dont know. YOU HAVE FREAKING MIGRAINES!! its not a reason to yell and be bitchy then get away with it. Just get over yourself" she gathered up her things and went to another table. 

"Carson its okay." Hailey said. 

"No its not. Everything she said was true. I do need to get over myself." i said.

"Lets just.. talk about something else." she said. We talked about our favorite game Virtual Families and ate lunch. When the bell rang for 6th period i stopped by the office and dropped off a permisson slip. I walked in and the secretary asked me," Antoher headache?" 

I shook my head. "Just dropping off a permission slip." i handed it to her, then went to 6th period. I thought."Does my whole life really revolve around my migraines?" Yes. Yes it does. 

By the time Spansih was other and i had heard Sra. Conard talk about her back surgery for the thousanth time, i was ready for gym.  In the hallway, i ran up to Elsa. 

"Elsa. Im sorry. I was wrong. My headaches are no excuse and im sorry. I do need to get over myself and i will. Just please forgive me." I said. 

She smirked." Yes Carson of course i forgive you.  But piss me off again and im gonna cut a bitch "

I smiled, "Good cause i couldnt live without my Jamacian Beach." (Inside joke. Remember this fanfic is based on real people and real relationships.)

"And I couldnt live without my little Satan's Gentials." she said. (Another inside joke.)

We were both sweating really bad when we finished gym and went to math. As usual, when we walked into the room, we were smacked in the face with the stench of 702. About 10 minutes into class an announcement came over the speaker. 

"We are now in a code red drill. I repeat this is just a drill."

Our teacher closed the door as we closed the windows then turned off the light. After about 5 minutes of silence, somebody jiggled the door handle. They always to that to test us. They knocked a few times and a kid named Andrew said," Housekeeping." we laughed and the teacher yelled. 

5 minutes later, somebody came back to the door and jiggled the handle again. Then he said," M'am open up. Its a cop." OF course we just ignored him but a few minutes later the door opened and standing there was a real cop! Everybody gasped then laughed. 

"He's got a gun!" Andrew yelled. 

Bum bum. bum bum. 

I could feel my heart in my feet. My head swirled. i was nauseous. I looked around. The typical hospital room. Heart monitors beeped and i could hear crying. Somebody died. I hoped i wasn't next, but with this pain i never know. The doctor walked in. 

"Hello Carson I'm here to check on ya. Okay?" he asked, facing the table putting gloves on. 

I just nodded.  I couldn't talk.  When the doctor turned to face me, i saw that he was Calum. 

"Hello beautiful. Why put yourself through so much pain? Why do you make yourself suffer?" he asked, checking my IVs. 

"I.. i don't mean to. It just happens."

"NO. You cause yourself this pain. Its all in here." Calum said, tapping my temple.

"Well. How do i stop it?" i asked, grabbing his hands. 

"Just stop thinking about it. Relax. Breath. You are going to be okay. breath and remember that you have been in this place before. You have been this uncomfortable and anxious and scared and you have survived. And know that you will survive this. I know these feelings are painful and debilitating but you can sit with them and eventually they will pass." he said. 

With my eyes closed, i took a deep breath and the hospital room melted away. I was at my local Barnes and Noble. I looked around and smiled. 

"I will survive."

"You guys now why we do this right?" the cop droned on about safty and code reds untill the bell finally rang and we were free. 

"Carson. Listen what i said earlier. I was thinking about it during the cops boring as hell speech. I didnt mean all of it." elsa said as we were walking to the bus. 

"No elsa. Everything you said was true. Dont appoligize. " i said. 

"Fine. But i am sorry, Anyway. see you tomorrow."She said getting on her bus. The day was finally over. 

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey guys!!! So sorry i havent updated in like forever but ive been really busy, ( not really.. just lazy ;) ) sorry for the short chapter, Ill try to get the next chapter up by the end of the week cause i am on spring break. Stay gucci

Love

Morgan

Day DreamingWhere stories live. Discover now