Got To Be Good-looking ('cause he's so hard to see)

~50~

Clare

July 31st 1974

Flat 12, 9 Curzon Place, Shepherd Market, Mayfair, London

"Vanessa, can you come here please" I was shuffling papers about on the small bureau in the corner when Vanessa wandered in. The 7 years old with red brimmed eyes watched quietly as I took her fingers in mine. This was so much for a little girl to have to deal with.

I slid the envelope toward her and got her to open it "Aeroplane tickets, Auntie Clare?"

"How would you like to come for a holiday to my house in Los Angeles?" Her first name was Owen but her and I always worked with her middle name, an auntie- niece special bond. "Just for a while til we work out where to build a nest, sweets"

"But I like it here"

"I know but if we have a holiday and visit the beach we can prepare us for where we both want to be" I've been a pretty absent auntie and it's only been the past year that her and I have bonded. Cass encouraging and pushing us to have outings, special moments together.

Perhaps Cass knew.

"I want my mummy" Vanessa clung to me like a leech and I almost lost the will to live, almost. Cass left us days ago, finally her heart had had enough, she had been doing so much better too.

"I do too huny, I do too"

Receiving a standing ovation, she bowed multiple times, flowers were offered which she grasped to her chest and the Palladium, full to the brim of Londoners, applauded loudly again. She smiled broadly, proudly and my heart swelled as I watched on from the wings.

Afterwards I left her at the flat and walked to meet friends at the local pub, I had only been back a day, so the reunion with friends was on my to do list and in any case Cass and I would be able to muck around all the rest of the week together....

Cass passed away overnight.

Vanessa tried to wake her in the morning, then came to my room. I had been asleep maybe an hour or two, Cass was asleep forever.

With Cass gone, I am now the custodian of my 7-year-old niece and I have no idea what to do. I'm not a mummy.

Maybe I'm not a mummy but I don't have to be though, do I.

I just have to be an auntie....