Sophie's feelings towards her best friend, Gabriel, she protects like it's her dearest treasure, in fear of someone finding them. In fear of him finding out. So she grabs her pen and writes her loveletters which he will never receive.
Dear Gabe I honestly think I need to stop writing these letters. It's draining me for energy. It felt good when I started with it, I got to write down all my feelings, but I've been thinking lately.
I've especially been thinking about what mum said.
I should go out and live. I thought I wanted to rot in my room, but I don't. Even though I don't want to let you go, I want to live. Make friends. I'm seventeen years old, for crying out loud.
When you were still here, I had a life. But it's become clear to me that I still have one. It's simply my fault for keeping on writing these damn letters and staying in my room without going out except for school.
I need to live. I need to be free.
That's what teenagers are meant to do, right?
So I'm going to try. I'm going to try and not write any more letters. At least not many more.
And, it doesn't really make sense... nothing of this makes sense. I'm writing to you but still, I'm not really writing to you. You'll never get these letters. Never. I wouldn't know what to do if you ever did read them. I wonder how my reaction would be. More important, how your reaction would be.
I hope you're doing well. And I hope you get balls enough to talk to me soon. Because I'm done trying.
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