•Notes•//DingDulian

•6•

DingDong:
My head was pounding and my arm hurt like hell.On my bedside table were two bottles of vodka,One was empty and the other one was only half empty, and a bloody razor was lying on it.I rolled up the sleeve of my sweater to see my whole arm was covered in dried up blood and it looked super disgusting.I got up and walked to the bathroom.All of a sudden I heard Julian open the front door.I locked the bathroom door and then held my arm under the cold water which came out of the faucet.It felt nice but also hurt a bit.We had no bandages or anything at home so I just had to leave it like this and just roll down my sleeve again.I unlocked the door and saw that Julian was standing next to my bed.He turned around and looked at me with big Eyes.
„What are you doing"I casually looked at him until I realised what was on my bedside table.My Eyes started watering and I could see Julian starring at me trying to figure out what to say.
„Show me"
„Julian-...I-"
„Ding Dong please" He seemed so upset which now officially made me cry.I rolled up my sleeve and starred at him.
„What is wrong with you"He shook his head and took my arm in his hand.
„I mean after all It's still your fault right" I don't know If I was actually mad at him now or if it was the alcohol.
Julian started crying while sitting down on my bed.
„I still love you"I starred at him waiting for a response but he just got up and walked towards me until he was really close to me.I didn't realise what was happening until Julian put his hands on both sides of my face and started leaning in.He brushed his lips against mine for a split second which was the best Feeling I ever had.Aftee that he started passionately kissing me but after 20Seconds he pulled away and just starred at me.
„I love you Julian."
Tears were still running down his face but when I said that It got worse.
„I'm so sorry"He sobbed and then walked out of my room.
„DON'T TO THIS TO ME JULIAN NOT AGAIN" I yelled so loud that everyone in this building could hear it.Right after I said that I heard the front door shut and then I was alone again.
Why did you do that Julian