Two Sides

Chapter 12 - The Decision

When you woke up the next morning, Ezekiel was already gone. It was still early, the sun was just about to rise but you weren't tired anymore. There was a light breeze coming in from the open window, barely there but still strong enough to make goosebumps form on your bare skin. But maybe it wasn't the air, maybe it was your nervousness. You took a deep breath and then folded back the sheets, swinging your legs over the edge of the bed in order to get up.

After you got dressed, you headed out to get some breakfast. Almost everyone was up by now and you wondered where Ezekiel was, if he had already made up his mind. You were sure he did, actually, and you hoped he'd fight with you, despite his doubts. Without the Kingdom, you were hopelessly outnumbered. You wished you knew more about the deal with the Saviors... if it was really that peaceful or how much the Saviors took from the place you grew to love. Then you'd know if it was worth it for them to fight.

A while later you met Rick and the others on their way to listen to the king's decree. You obviously didn't know any more than them, Ezekiel hadn't told you anything last night, so you were just as tense. It was clear that some members of the group expected you to have convinced him, others weren't looking very confident. You were scared of both. Hopelessness and the pressure of their expectations.

It was Richard who brought you to Ezekiel which wasn't surprising. You had quickly learned that he was very much in favor of fighting the Saviors. He led you to the targets for the archery training, very close to where you usually had your knife throwing lessons. A few younger members of the community were practicing there at the moment, you recognized them but now you weren't one of them anymore. You were back with your own group. It felt weird.

"This is life here," Ezekiel proclaimed from his position behind the kids, watching a disabled girl precisely shoot an arrow. "Every day. But it came at a cost."

He turned around and walked towards Rick. You were standing at the side, not wanting to be part of an argument should one arise. Everyone was watching him and in that moment he was as kinglike as one can be.

"And I wanted more of this. I wanted to expand, create more places like this," he continued. "Men and women lost their limbs, children lost their parents... because I sent them into battle against the wasted when I did not need to."

You swallowed hard. He hadn't told you about this, but now you knew why the thoughts last night had worried him so much. Why this was such a hard decision for him. The Kingdom had a history, just like Alexandria.

"This is different," Rick interrupted and approached him.

"It isn't."

"It is," Rick repeated firmly. "The dead don't rule us. The world doesn't look like this outside your walls, people don't have it as good. Some people don't have it good at all."

Ezekiel listened to him but you could tell his mind was made up. "I have to worry about my people."

Rick turned around, clearly agitated. He was a lot like that since the whole Negan dilemma which was understandable. But compared to Ezekiel, it looked desperate... which was probably true. Rick had a point there. You were all desperate for help when you wanted to win.

"You call yourself a damn king," Daryl chimed in. "You sure as hell don' act like one."

Ezekiel turned to look at Daryl, who was almost standing next to you, and walked into his direction, now directly addressing him. "All of this came at a cost. It was lives. Arms. Legs." He motioned towards the kids and then he turned back around to face Rick. "The peace we have with the Saviors is uneasy. But it is peace. I have to hold on to it."