Never As It Seems

Chapter 8

   Hi guys! In this chapter, I feel like you get to see a bit more of Jesse's character. You'll like him I promise. And anybody reading this, THANK YOU!!! I'd love to hear everybody's opinions on the story. I know it's really rough, and I'll probably just go back and rewrite everything again after I finish these edits, but an opinion would help! So drop a comment or send me a message, whatever floats your boat. :)

************************************************************************

I expected the ride back to my house would be slightly awkward. I mean, I’ve had my fair share of kisses, but nothing like that. Normally I would take care to at least know a guy a week before kissing him.

But it wasn’t weird at all.

I glanced over at Jesse to try and read his expression. He looked happy and carefree. Things that I deeply envied. I haven’t been able to feel that way in a long time. Jesse look light and like he didn’t have anything in the world to worry about.

I felt weighed down and like I was carrying a lot of baggage. Jesse took that moment to notice I was staring, and he started to stare back.

“How about watching the road?” I said sarcastically.

He shot me a cute smile and grabbed my hand in his. I jerked back from the sudden touch, not expecting it. The look on his face was pained, and it just tore me up. Crap.

“Jesse, I’m sorry. Don’t give me that look. It’s like a sad little teddy bear.” I said, taking his hand in mine. “Its just, you have to understand how weird this is for me. Everytime I look at you I can’t help but think of Jacen.”

He shot me a sad smile and I continued talking. “But when you talk, you don’t remind me anything of him. You’re personalities are actually surprisingly different.” I said.

Jesse squeezed my hand and smiled. “Maybe you should just close your eyes more often.”

I offered him a quick laugh. “I like that you remind me of Jace. It makes me feel safe. But thinking about the fact that I’m sitting in a car kissing somebody who looks identical to my best friend throws me off a little bit. I mean, I feel like I’m slapping Jacen in the face.”

He looked at me questioningly, and I continued. “Its like, ‘Hey, Jacen. I know you’re dead and everything. But I found this incredibly guy who looks exactly lik you, but somehow he’s got this amazing sexy appeal to him that I never saw in you and I could never see myself kissing you but I could kiss him again.’ It just feels wrong!” I said, all in a rush.

Jesse smirked at me then and I clapped a hand over my face, realizing what I had said. I rarely blush, but I felt my cheeks flaming.

“That was supposed to stay in my head.” I said, grimacing at his smug expression.

“Amazing sexy appeal, huh? I like that. And I could definitely go for kissing you again too.” He said, shooting me a grin and winking.

A faltered for a second at his adorable expression, feeling my breathe catch. He really is gorgeous. Why didn’t I notice all of this on Jacen? It’s so weird.

I looked up at him to see that he was grinning again. “What?” I asked, still mesmerized by his smile.

“Now I’m gorgeous too?” He asked.

Shit. I actually said that out loud too. What’s wrong with my mouth today?

“Honestly, Jesse. After everything I just told you all you got was that?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Hey. Boys need compliments too.” He said, childishly sticking out his tongue.

I rolled my eyes as Jesse stopped the car, pulling into my driveway.