entry 365 ➸ harry styles

XIV

{ skinny love - birdy }

hes, coming. hes not going to come. hes coming. hes not going to come. hes...

"miss, are you getting in?" the cab driver almost snapped.

"yeah, yeah, sorry." i called out, picking up my small suitcase. i took one more look around, searching the grounds of my house, the path, towards the gate, to see if harry was coming.

nothing, i saw nothing.

he wasnt going to come. the desire to cry came and died. so, dry-eyed i moved towards the cab, the man was holding open my door like a chauffeur. i smiled at him lightly.

he picked up my suitcase and stuffed it into the back of the cab.

"myla!" i heard a familiar voice call out. expecting it to be harry, i snapped my head towards the voice.

only to be disappointed when i found a co-worker running towards me. he was the only person i ever considered to be my friend, but i pushed him away for my own selfish needs.

"you weren't possibly going to leave without saying goodbye, were you?" he challenged, laughing at his own expense. i let out a chuckle which soon died into a sigh.

"im sorry, capri" i apologised.

his name wasnt capri of course, but capri was the deep colour of the mediterranean sea, and it reminded me of his eyes.

he shrugged, "its fine, myla. im just going to miss your company".

"i-i'll stay if you really want" i stuttered, i wasnt sure why i said that. i didnt want to stay. and if i would have ended up staying it wouldnt have been for capri.

he shook his head at me, "you worry too much about pleasing everyone" he told me. "its time you focus on yourself, just send a postcard of your adventures" he smiled.

i nodded at him. and when i was about to speak, the cab driver called out for me again impatiently.

"well, farewell myla, i hope you find what you're looking for" capri bent forward awkwardly and kissed me on the cheek. it wasnt with a romantic intent, it was friendly.

id found what i was looking for, he just wasnt coming.

i headed into the cab, still looking around.

he wasnt coming.

i had to wave goodbye to dreamland as i sat back into the cab, frowning at the empty space next to me. the space harry was meant to be seated in.

"where to miss?" the cab driver questioned.

"the airport" i bluntly replied.

harry, why didnt you come?

entry 14;

dear diary,

oh, harry. didnt you believe me? or didnt you believe IN me? or maybe you were just scared for the both of us. scared of commitment. scared of yourself.

i waited for you, and yet you never came. so now im going to start a new life.

a new life without you, harry styles.

  ➸  ➸  ➸

a/n: so, yeah. that just happened. 

should i do a chapter in harry's POV? on this exact day so y'all can see why he didnt come? or do you want it to remain a mystery?