entry 365 ➸ harry styles

XXVII

a/n: just a short a/n. i BEG you to listen to the song below whilst reading this. it just fits so well - THIS IS THE LAST FREAKING CHAPTER. insane. thank you to everyone who has voted, commented, and even been a ghost reader. i love each & every one of you. happy reading (get your damn tissues at the ready)

{ sign of the times - harry styles }

entry 365;

dear diary,

thanks for keeping my many memories that my brain cannot contain. however, maybe its time to say goodbye. to you. to him. the year, the 365 days. it was all thanks to you.

but maybe its not, maybe im not ready to say goodbye. i love harry. ive spent the whole night tossing and turning thinking about him. all this time i could never read his eyes, i could never understand him, all because his lips told me dirty lies.

but hes ready now, hes put his love out on the table. and i truly believe him.

id never forgive myself if something happened to harry, and have it be on my own accord. he doesnt deserve that. the psychopath in me has been put to rest because the reality has hit me that harry truly does love me; so i dont need to make a fake reality where i pretend he does.

he has made me question every single promise i have ever made to myself. hes made me open up when i didnt even want to let myself in. he helped me to breathe when i didnt want to anymore. he helped me see that its okay to fall in love again.

im coming to get you, harry. we can finally be happy.

    ➸ ➸ ➸ 

i gently closed my diary after allowing the ink to dry, so it wouldnt smudge. that diary documented my most spectacular moments id spent with harry, some not so beautiful, but thats what would only make us stronger. i could now be excited for when our future kids would ask 'hey! how did you and dad meet?', and id show them that diary.

leaving out the fact harry did want to kill me, of course.

i admired the torn baby blue leather on the front of the diary; it was ripped in the corners, the colour had started peeling off all over the front. but it held my most splendid memories; i loved it.

i was getting ready to see harry, to tell him i forgave him so he could then forgive himself. i pulled on a tight pair of distressed jeans, and one of his large jumpers which hid my thin curves. i brushed through my thick blonde hair, teasing with the ends.

i couldnt help but smile when i thought about harry as i did so.

you love because life is short, and there was nothing more fulfilling than that four letter word and how it felt. my heart beat wildly whenever i thought about his emerald eyes.

"shame on you, little sis. i thought i taught you better" arlos voice was like a bucket of ice-water being thrown over my head. i snapped my head to the doorway. my brother was leaning against the wall with a lighter situated in his fingers. he also had a gun in his hand, pointing straight at me. i felt incredibly stupid for not hearing him come in.

i looked down at the letter arlo was holding in his other hand with the lighter, he put the gun in his belt momentarily before staring at both objects in his hand. then suddenly, he brought the lighter up to harry's letter, and he burnt it. he watched as it melted into his hands as nothing but ash, he was smiling like a psychopath, ironically.