Finding My Husband's Heart

Chapter 34: Conversations and Midnight Snacks

Sarah's P.O.V

We had dinner facing the beach, a good old fashioned family meal. It was around ten o'clock when John asked us to retire to our rooms as we had a new day ahead full of fun activities, he was sure to be held. Keith and I trudged to our room in silence. What could we say to each other when we were going to be stuck in four walls with so much tension between us?

We went in and shut the door. I left the breath I've been holding in, slowly. As soon as I heard the click of the door I knew it was locked. Shit! I looked at him and he suddenly looked away. I was about to tuck myself in when he said, 'Can I talk to you?'

My eyes shot open at that. Should I? As long as didn't let my guard down...

'Sure', I said, getting up to a sitting position in bed. He sat on the thick carpet on the floor and patted the space next to him, indicating me to sit there. I got down and joined him. He fiddled with the carpet edge and then his eyes met mine. My blue eyes locked with his grey ones. It took a moment for me to escape the swirling pools of grey like there was a tornado forming underneath. It was captivating. It always was. He started speaking.

'I know I was an asshole to you, Sarah. I know that a real man would not have done what I did.'

'I was helpless, Sarah. I hated everyone around me who made me leave the girl I loved. I just thought it was unfair that people like Jake got to be with their one, while I got ripped away from mine. I'm not saying that it justifies my actions but I just vented my anger onto you and that was wrong.'

'I don't want my past anymore. Maybe I'm too late. But I want to prove to you that I can be much more. A better person. A person who you thought you loved. I can't try without knowing if you'll give me chance.'

I was stunned. Give him a chance? What? I was speechless. I wanted to say yes but the more rational part of my brain screamed at me. How are you sure he won't hurt you again!!!!!

That made me stop and think for a while. That was true. How do I know that? I can't trust him with all my heart, be stupid and naïve as I once was. I was different now. The old Sarah who unconditionally loved Keith, was gone the day she found out he left to London.

'What happened in London?' I asked him.

'My ex-girlfriend, Jessica, is happy and she moved on.' 'Don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for another chance just because I want to forget her.' 'That isn't even a reason. I just want to let go of the past and live a life where I am happy and everyone around me is happy.' 'I can't have that life with anyone else except you, Sarah.' 'I don't want to have that life with anyone else.'

I was quiet again. He continued, 'She's just a good friend now. I'm not sure how it happened so quickly but I want to give us a shot. Since we got married, there are some days when I've... maybe I'm pushing it too far. We'll talk about that later.'

'No, tell me,' eager to know.

He twiddled his thumbs nervously. 'Remember that kiss? I felt...something.' His cheeks reddened. Whoa! He was blushing because of me?

'So, what do you say? Will you give me another chance?' He asked me, with a flicker of hope in his grey eyes.

I looked down unable to meet his eyes. 'How can I trust you again?' I mumbled.

He hung his head slightly like a child being banned from buying candy.

'Why not be friends first?' He suggested.

That wasn't that bad, I thought. It'll give me an opportunity to get to know him well. I wasn't a seven year old to blindly have a crush on him. I could see if I like his real self. I might decide to trust him or I might not. This was okay. Friends is safe.

'Okay.' I said cheerfully and smiled at him. He smiled back, we shook hands and a spark ignited my skin. This was going to be hard.

I heard my stomach grumble and I'm sure Keith heard it too. We looked at each other and he threw his head back and laughed. I looked down shyly, my cheeks reddening. He got up and I looked up at him. 'Wait here.' He sneaked out of the room.

Where was he going? I waited as he instructed me to. One minute passed, two, three, four, and then a knock came on the door. I shot up suddenly, I opened the door cautiously to reveal Keith holding three big packets of crisps, one was tucked between his teeth and two were tucked under his arms and he was holding two buckets of butterscotch ice cream. He looked incredibly funny. I stood there laughing as he kept beckoning me to open the door wider so he could come in. I opened it.

We sat down together and opened a bag of crisps and shared it and as we reached to get a handful, our hands would graze each other. The first time it happened, our eyes met. He casually shrugged it off but butterflies swam in my stomach, I ignorantly blamed it on the hunger. We continued to munch and Keith put on a movie. Out of everything he chose Minions. I looked at him bemused. He looked at me, and looked annoyed at my mocking look.

'No one is ever too old for animation plus minions are funny.' I stifled my giggle. I dived into the ice cream bucket as the movie started.

a/n: hey guys!!!!! Hope you love the chapter... what do you guys say? Will Keith be a better person to Sarah now? Can't wait to see what new mischief the young couple is up to... please vote, comment and recommend.