I was getting better I swear,
But when I drove someone to suicide the guilts engraved in my mind were too much to bare
I don't know if I'm scared of the future or if I'd be alive till then
And don't tell me I'll be okay because you can't even you explain when
I'm sick of crying every night not knowing what I'll do
And I'm tired of painting my canvas and tired of all of you
I have become the monster I was scared to be
I don't remember anything bright from my childhood, there was never a healthy me
My life is surrounded by different types of abuse and the thoughts won't let me go
Because how can you get back up when your stuck in an all time low?
