Emotions-Buried deep within

To be Blamed

I lie on my bed like usual
Staring at the ceiling
Thinking of my past
The regrets, the happiness.
The mistakes i made
Ruined the people around me.
I walk with pride
But bad luck seems to surround me.
I think about the person i ruined,
The person whom i loved the most.
I was the reason
For all his problems
For all his worries.
I didn't mean to.
But i couldn't stop them.
Every time i think
How I ruined him
How I left his responsibilities
In the hands of his parents
Thinking they Will take care of him.
And now realising
That I was wormg
My heart constricts
A unbelievable pain surrounds my heart.

Then I remember the day
When he opened up to me.
I realised I was just an excuse for his frustrations.
The people who hurt him
Are living their lives
Healthy and happy,
While he lies six feet under the ground,
Buried with his pains.
How can I forgive the people
Who were his so called family,
Who let him die,
Who let him suffer throughout so many years.
They used to blame me
But can't they see
They are murderers.
The killed him with their words.
He tried everything he could,
He gave up.
He didn't want to burden others.
How can i forgive the people
Who took my soul away.
How can I forget the pain he suffered?
How can I forget the tears that he wasted?
How can sympathize with a mother
Because of whom i lost my husband?

I have buried my hatred in my heart
Cause i can't hurt the people he loved.
I wish I can show her the mirror,
And break it on her face.
Just to make her feel
The little bit of his pain.

I believe there will come a time
When they will know
What he went through.
I believe there will come a time
When the guilt will eat them up.
The day will come
When they will wish to die
Just Like Him.

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