Danger II // J.N

Chapter 12

*month later*

Anna's POV.

I lay in bed, hearing the birds chirp from outside. It was sweet at first, but now it's incredibly annoying.  It's almost noon. I've been in bed all morning.

My depression has been really bad. I can't seem to do much. I mean, I've quit everything. I just work and go to school. I haven't been to any parties. I haven't drank. I haven't smoked.

My depression has sucked me in.

I haven't talked to anyone but family since Jace and I last talked. Which was a month ago. I miss him so much.

If I could just go back and fix my mess, I would. I would do it in a heartbeat. But I can't.

I sit up in bed, and grab my phone. I stand up and walk to my dresser, grabbing a pair of sweatpants and a loose shirt. I change into them and grab my keys.

I want to see Jace. I doubt he'll be home. But it's worth a shot.

After driving for twenty months, I arrive at his street. I slowly drive down the street, and I see a "for sale" sign stuck in the ground in front of his house.

My heart shatters. I pull into the driveway. I turn off the car. I stair at his garage door, and look up at his old bedroom window.

Tears form in my eyes. I gulp. I turn on my car and back out of the driveway. I drive down the street, making my way back home.

I arrive home, seeing Corey's car parked in my driveway. I squint my eyes. I park on the street. I get out of my car and walk up the driveway as Corey and Sean get out of Corey's car.  

"Hey, what are you guys doing here?" I ask, approaching them.

"We haven't seen you in a long time. We thought we should check up, see how ya doing?" Corey says.

I smile. "I'm doing better. I left the house. But I'm still quite upset and depressed," I say. Sean nods.

I lead them inside to the basement, and go in my room. Clothes lay across my floor, and bottles of water sit around my room.

"Sorry for the mess. When I'm depressed I never clean up," I say. Corey nods, understanding.

"Have you heard from Jace? I just drove over and saw the for sale sign," I say.

Sean bites his lip. "I know he's back into gangs. I haven't heard from him though," He explains.

My stomach churns. I tilt my head. "I miss him," I say softly.

Corey nods, pursing his lips. "I do too. First Jack, then Peyton, then Jace. We had a friend group going on, and we've lost every key member," He says.

My eyes widen. "I forgot about Jack," I say softly.

Sean smiles. "You didn't know him as well as we did. He wasn't as crazy as Peyton, though," He says. Corey nods.

"Jace is in a gang? What's he doing?" I ask.

Sean shrugs his shoulders. "I don't know. Nothing good, that's for sure," He says.

I look down. "It doesn't really surprise me. I was the person that changed him. I kinda made him a different person," I say. Corey and Sean nod.

"Do you guys wanna order a pizza? We planned on staying here for a while," Sean says, chuckling. I smile and nod.

We ordered the pizza, along with some side snacks. We ate the food, watched some reality tv in the downstairs living room, and hung out for a couple hours.

***

I sit on my bed, working on my AP music theory homework. My phone starts vibrating. I glance over at the text message.

Nana: Hi Anna! Scott and i have missed seeing you around. Jace too. Speaking of Jace, he hasn't been doing so well. I'm worried. I actually moved him into a sober living facility. I think that when you two were together, he was a better person. he treated himself so much better. I'm hoping you can write to him. Don't text or call, he doesn't have a phone with him. Just write a letter and make sure he gets it. We all considered you family. We all miss you. Take care!

I part my lips. I bite the inside of my cheek. I take a deep breath and let it out. I grab my notebook and rip out a sheet of paper. I immediately start writing.

jace,

hey. I heard what's going on. I'm sorry. I really hope everything will be okay. I miss you a lot. it sounds crazy, after the note we left on. deep down, we both have feelings. wether we like to admit it or not. we still love each other, and our pupils widen when we see each other. distance, addictions, relationships, mental illnesses, nothing will end my love for you. you've taught me to never trust a guy again. but you've also taught me that love is powerful. as much as I'd like to forget about us, it surrounds me. it swallows me up. I can't forget about you. I'm sorry for being so awful to you. I'm sorry for neglecting to talk before you moved. I'm sorry for being such a mess, and dragging you into my messes. you don't deserve that. I know you think otherwise but I truly believe you are a great person and you deserve the world. you deserve happiness and peace. and hey, maybe that'll come your way. in the next ten years. I hope in the next ten years, you'll have a stable job, a family, a home, your dream car. i hope in the next ten years, you find your purpose in life and your happy spot. and I hope that once you find your happy spot, you pin yourself there and live it forever. we didn't work out like we hoped. we ended up being so utterly toxic we affected those around us. but I still love you. and you still love me. we just aren't healthy humans. it's common logic. one unhealthy person plus another unhealthy person equals a disaster. I would say we were a beautiful disaster. I love you, Jace. I miss you a lot. I miss our good times. when we both were so high on life. maybe one day we'll see each other again. I'd love to see you sometime soon. I hope you find your way in life. I hope you rid of the negativity right now. i know you can. you have before.

Love,

Anna. xoxo.

I read the letter, feeling my heart slowly throb. I think about Jace, and how in love I was with him. I squint my eyes, thinking about all the changes that have happened this year. I gulp.

I fold the letter. I take a deep breath, feeling mixed emotions.

I stand up holding the letter against my stomach. I look down, every single thought in my head relating to Jace. Tears form in my eyes. I crack a slight smile, remembering the first time I met him.

"Anna? I gotta go to the store, do you need anything?" My mom asks from the other side of the door.

"Uh, yeah. Where are the envelopes?" I ask.

"They're in the office, above the computer!" She replies.

I nod. "Thanks," I reply.

I hear her footsteps move away. I look at the wall next to my bed. A string of polaroids hangs in the center. Most of the pictures are of Jace and I. I smile. I gently reach over and unpin one picture. Us sitting together in front of a bonfire at my seventeenth birthday. My arms crossed, holding his hands and our fingers intertwined, while I sit on his lap. He kisses my cheek as I smile.

"I love you, Danger."

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Hiiiiiii! So quick note, the next chapter will be a time skip. You'll see why, but I'm just warning you that the time skip is to when Jace and Anna are adults and they're out of college. total spoiler, but I feel like it's better to say that now than just have it happen. 😂