True Beauty lies Beneath the Skin (Phan)

I Wanna Fuck You Like an Animal (Explicit Content)

Explicit Content Warning: I think you can guess by the title.

I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

Dan's heart began to rapidly pound as the gates to Phil's house opened in front of him and he began to walk up the driveway.

After their rather interesting evening together when Dan went to go see Phil's show, it was, in a sense, agreed upon that things between the two of them would be going even farther than before when Phil returned home from tour. Dan could hardly stand his anticipation. Dan's birthday had come and gone and Bella was almost finished with school, yet most of what Dan could fixate on was Phil coming back.

Bella had been invited to a sleepover at a friend's house, so Dan didn't have to worry about finding someone to watch her while he stayed the night with Phil. He'd been a bit nervous at first, as Bella had never stayed over with a friend before, but he was also extremely relieved to know that Bella wasn't having trouble making friends and that her childhood was a fun one. She hadn't invited any friends of hers to her birthday, which had worried Dan a little bit at the time, so when she came home from school asking if she could stay over with her friend, Dan said "yes" with no hesitation.

This also gave Dan an excuse to not be in his apartment. He'd stayed over at Phil's place before, but only once, and it was completely innocent because they'd only just started dating and Bella had fallen asleep in between them. It was nothing like tonight would be like...

To be honest, Dan didn't know what tonight would be like. It'd been so long since he'd done anything with anyone period, let alone with a guy in a situation where it was for the most part established that he'd be bottoming. He'd done that with his first relationship; he and his boyfriend at the time were together for about eight months and did quite a bit in those eight months. Some of it was great, some of it wasn't so great...So Dan was hoping for only good things to come of tonight.

The wait for Phil to come home from tour was agonizing. Dan missed him so much when he was gone, and so did Bella. It was so hard to concentrate on living life like he normally would when Dan was, dare he say, falling in love with the lanky guitar player of Runaway Exorcist.

Yes, Dan had finally admitted to himself that he'd fallen completely head over heels for Phil Lester. He wasn't sure he wanted to say it yet, but he did do something else to show just how much he cared. It was something small, something Phil may not even notice it, and Dan was fine with that, because it meant something to Dan and gave him a lot more confidence in his and Phil's situation.

As Dan prepared to come to Phil's house, he'd looked at himself in the mirror at least nine times to make sure he looked decent and presentable. As he fixed his hair, his fingers grazed the back of his neck where he felt the chain around his neck that had what would have been Marissa's engagement ring on it. He'd still been wearing it all this time while he'd been dating Phil. Dan's feelings for Marissa had, in fact, slowly dissipated. Dan wasn't sure if that happened because of Phil, or if his feelings for her were gone long ago and he just wouldn't let himself admit it because he was hurt and because he felt guilty.

He still missed her; of course he did. However, he didn't miss her in the way someone would miss a significant other...It was almost in the way you would miss a best friend. Dan was in love with her at the time; he was so in love with her that he thought he'd never love anyone again after she died...until Phil came alone. Marissa's death was absolutely the most painful thing Dan had ever had to go through in his entire life, and he wore what would have been her ring on that necklace at first because he was still in love with her and didn't want to let her go...