Yes Homo {Boyf-riends} [Be more chill fanfic]

Chapter 4: Problems

Michael's POV

The doctor arrived shortly after Jeremy fell back asleep, with him in this state how can I tell if the Squip is gone? What if it hurts him again!? I couldn't protect him... I shouldn't have run in the bathroom I should have helped him.

"So what happened?" I ask, the doctor impatiently. The doctor had just done an X-ray on him.

"Seems like he had a severe shock to his  Temporal and Occipital lobe." The doctor says.

"What does that mean?" I ask.

"I can't tell you exactly since I don't have all my equipment but if we are lucky, just temporary vision and hearing failure." He says calmly.

"What do you mean lucky?!" I panic.

"Sir, please calm down." The doctor says.

"Sorry." I sigh. The door opens.

"Jeremy I saw the- Michael what happened!?" Jeremy's dad asks.

"He passed out." I say giving him a 'and you know why look'.

"Oh... how is he doc?" He asks.

"He should be fine, but call me when he wakes up, I would like him to answer a few questions." The doctor says, packing his bag.

"Yes sir.." I say.

"I'll show you out." Jeremy's dad says, and they leave. I lean against the wall, I can't help but feel this is my fault

~time skip~

I sat there a long time.. I didn't want to leave him, throughout that time I began to question if he knew what he was saying when he flirted with me. He was probably really drowsy, I squeeze my cut, causing to start bleeding again. I curse under my breath as it stains my hoodie.

"Michael." Jeremy's voice says, making me jump. I hide my cut behind my back.

"H-hey!" I laugh nervously.

Jeremy smiles but his eyes were looking just past me.

"Can you see?" I ask. He shakes his head. I sigh in both relief and sadness.

"Is the Squip gone?" I ask.

"Sort of.. he's always there but now he can't do anything." Jeremy explains.

"Oh god...I hate myself, of course you were peer pressured... I shouldn't have gotten so upset." I mumble.

"What no! Honestly you were under reacting!" Jeremy says. I could tell he was completely conscious now.

"Not really but... uh do you remember... last time you woke up?" I ask him, I don't know what I wanted the answer to be.. I guess I just wanted one.

"Yeah and I meant it." He smiles, and I blush.

"The doctor wanted me to call him when you were up!" I say changing the subject.

I grab my phone and type in the number on his business card. Jeremy looks towards the clock.

"What time is it?" He asks.

"Four." I say.

"Pm?" He asks confused, he had called me here at 5.

"Am.." I say. He looked shocked.

"Why are you still here?" He asks.

I wait anxiously as the phone rings, no one picked up. I put my phone down.

"I wanted to make sure you were ok." I say.

Jeremy blushed but I don't think his senses were completely active because he didn't seem to notice.

"So.......you like me back?" I ask quietly.

Jeremy stared blankly at the wall just behind me. He squinted... is that a no.... or did he just not hear me.

"You should go home.. it's late." He said.. he sounded worried... so that means he didn't hear me... I hope.

"Your dads away... I can't leave you alone." I say.

Jeremy took a few moments to process what I said.

"At least go home and get some stuff, I'll be fine for a bit." He says.

"Are you sure?" I ask. Jeremy nods. I get up.

"Don't try to walk." I say, he smiles in response

"Drive safe." He says.

"I will." I smile.

I was overwhelmed with happiness but also grief and guilt.... this is my fault.. that's all I could think as I drove home. I did this, I could have saved him but instead I ran away. I begin to lose control of my car as I almost hit a rabbit in the road, I got control and the rabbit was fine but part of me wishes I had crashed but Jeremy needs me..

I park the car and hop into my room, I put my extra hoodie on my bed then pack my favorite one and a random red one with a few shirts and jeans, who knows how long I will have to stay. I also pack other essentials and... I cut myself more I don't know why.. I blame myself I guess I deserve it... I put another bloodstained cloth on the cuts and throw the bloody purple hoodie I was wearing in my laundry bin. I set out once again to return.

When I get back Jeremy was still awake, trying to see his phone.

"Need help?" I ask, making him jump.

"Sorry." I chuckle and he smiles.

"It's ok, my dad texted me can you read it?" He asks, tossing me his phone. I catch it, my arm letting out a sharp pain that I ignore.

"He said he won't be back for another week." I say nervously

"Where did he go?" He asks.

"I think to find a good neurologist." I answer.

Jeremy nods in understanding. I sprawl my sleeping bag across the floor with my pillow and stuff on it.

We just started to talk, tell each other things we didn't tell before and just being open... well mostly anyways if I told Jeremy that I off-ed myself he would get worried, all he should be worried about is healing. We went on for hours, falling to sleep and in love.

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Ahhhhhhhh I ship it so much but you don't have to read this, this note is just to fool kat that I wrote 1000 words but I want to end it here so I'm rambling in a note so I can still have lots of words, I know I'm such a good person anywho continue with your life frens 😜