Will He Ever Be Mine?

Epilogue : Part 1

"We are gathered here today to celebrate the homegoing of Miss Kelsey Claiborne." The preacher said and I looked around at everyone crying. I cried a little bit but not as much as grandma, papa, Bry, or Uncle Toni. I know I'm only nine, but I know what's going on. I know my mommy isn't coming back. I dreamed about her last night. In the dream She told me to stay strong, don't let anything or anyone hold me back from my dreams, make her proud, and that she would be in my heart every step of the way.

Yes I miss her very much. I love her more than I love anyone else that I know. She told me I could live with who I wanted but I'm not sure who. I don't want to live with daddy because he won't pay any attention to me. He got married and is about to have a baby. I'm the baby and I don't like it. I don't know what to do.

"Now we will have Little Miss Miracle Salerazio to read a poem that her mother wanted to be read at her homecoming service." He said and daddy walked me up to the altar.

"Hello, this poem is called Miss Me, But Let Me Go and my mommy liked it a lot." I started.

"When I've come to the end of the road and the Sun has set for me,

I want no rights in a gloom-filled room, Why cry for a soul set free?

Miss me a little but not too long and not with your head bowed low.

Remeber the love that we once shared, miss me but let me go.

For this is a journey we all must take and we all must go alone,

It's all a part of the master's plan, a step in the road to home.

When you are lonely and sick at heart go to the friends we know,

and burry your sorrows in doing good will, miss me but let me go."

When I was finished I stepped away and daddy helped me down and I walked back to my seat.

"Thank you Miracle, now we have a few people who Kelsey wrote letters for and she wants them to read it. Please come up." He said and Bry, Riley, Grandma, and daddy got up.

"Hi i'm Kelsey's mom but you knew that already. Dear Mommy, Yes I still call you mommy and always will Lol. Well, I just want you and daddy to know that I love the both of you. Toni and his millions of kids too haha. I wish that I could still be there. I'm sad that I won't be able to be there for Miracle. I want you to let Miracle know that no matter what I love her, I want her to be the best Mi Mi she can be, not let anyone or anything stand in the way of her dreams, and know that I'm with her all the while. I'm giving Miracle the choice to who she wants to live with. It's up to her and everyone should be happy with and respect her decision. Remember when I said "Is it wrong that I want this to be over" and you said "No, but let nature take it's course." ? Well I did and I'm so happy about the time I had spent on Earth.You were my best friend and I don't want you to be all sad. The poem that was read? Keep that in mind as you go on. Take care of yourself and tell daddy to do the same. I love you big diva Lol, with Love, Kelsey. KISSES BABY!"

"I'm Bryce, Kelsey's best friend. "Dear Bry, I want to start off by saying I love you. If I ever heart your feelings in any way, can you forgive me? I know that over the years we got close and we went through things and said things we shouldn't have, but I want you to know that there wasn't a day I went without thinking about you. If I was still alive and doing great and this cancer was gone, I would be all yours babe Lol. I just couldn't bare to see your heart hurting more than it needed to be for me. You'll be up here with me later on in life and we'll be happy together again. I know you've "moved on" but I know I'll always have a special place in your heart and vice versa. I love you Bryce and I'm happy that you're happy. I'll see you later player hater Lmboo! With Love, Kelsey The Great *insert three crying laughing emojis*"

"I'm Riley, I've known Kelsey basically all our lives. "Dear Riy, HEY BETCH!!! Lol okay that was inappropriate mom I'm sorry Lol. I miss you Asia and Faith. Y'all where my mains and y'all know that. I love y'all soooo much and wish we were just eating ice cream with Oreos. I want you to take care of that baby. Love he or she as if you'll die if you don't. You never know how long you'll be on this Earth. I know that right huh? Obviously if you're reading this. I've known you longer than any of my friends. You're Mi Mi's GodMother and I want you to also give her the love that I can't. She adores you and I want y'all to do girly things together. I want you to do for her what no one else can. Tell José that if he tries to leave y'all, if God gives me permission I will haunt him until he starts to do right! I love you babes, Kelsey."

"I'm Miracle's dad. Everyone thought I was dead but I had a reason for that and I don't care to explain at the moment. Dear Nolen, well you're back you other name for a donkey! I'm glad you're not dead but at the same time I want to kill you. Two years, two years You were gone. Two years I felt like dieing. Two years I stressed about you and nearly lost Mi Mi. That's why her name is Miracle. That night when I opened the door and you were standing there I thought I was going crazy and being delusional, but it was you. I was so happy to have you back. You were My first love, and always will be. The love I had for you as a boyfriend is nearly gone, but the love I have for you as my child's father will never leave. If Miracle chooses to be with you, give her the attention she needs Nolen. Yes I know that you have a life, but Dont neglect your child, our child, for any reason. I love you blockhead, Kelsey Kels.

"Now we will have a musical selection by our choir." The pastor said.

Truth is I'm tired, options are few. I'm trying to pray, but where are you? I'm all churched out, hurt and abused.
I can't fake, what's left to do?

Truth is I'm weak, no strength to fly.No tears to cry, even if I tried. But still my soul, refuses to die. One touch, will change, my life.

Take me to the King. I don't have much to bring. My heart's torn in pieces, it's my offering. Lay me at the throne. Leave me there alone, to gaze upon your glory, and sing to You this song. Please take me to the King.

Truth is it's time, to stop playing these games. We need a word, for the people's pain. So Lord speak right now, let it pour like rain. Oh yeah, we're desperate. We're chasing after you.

No rules, no religion. I've made my decision, to run to you, the healer that I need...

*skips parts*

Lord we're in the way. We keep making mistakes. The glory's not for us, it's all for You...

*skips*

Take me to the King. Take me to the King. Take me to the King...

After the song, the preacher preached, we prayed, then went to the burial site. We prayed again, then we all left to go eat. I really miss my mommy. "Miracle what do you want to eat?" Grandma asked me. "I just want two chicken wings, a roll, macaroni, and a piece of pound cake with vanilla ice cream. Oh, and a Mtn Dew." I said and she nodded. Everyone ate, talked, said our goodbyes, then we went home.

"Mi Mi, you want to sleep with me and grandma?" Papa asked after I got ready for bed and I nodded. "Come on baby girl." He said lifting me in his arms carrying me to there room. Grandma wa already in bed with her back facing the door but turned around when she herd us. "Let's say our prayers, then go to sleep." Papa said. "Dear Lord, thank you for another day. I hope Kelsey made it to your presence. For us she was a blessing but at least we know she's resting and not out here stressing. We pray that you heal our family in ways only you can. In jesus name we pray, Amen."

"Amen." Grandma and I said in unison. "Goodnight mommy, I love you." I whispered so that only I can hear before going to sleep on papa's chest.

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Not much, but aye it's an update.

P.S. Kelsey wrote those letters before all of this. Remember When she told Nolen to go get a notebook and pen? Lol probably not but that's when she did it.

***Queen_GoldChains***