millies pov;i whip my head back and see finn playing on his phone, not even acknowledging the assignment on the desk. he looks up at me and i give him a questioning look. he gives me a look of disgust, as if he didn't just kiss my finger.
finns eyes eventually travel back to his phone to continue playing, wait no, typing. i get curious and push the top of his phone down, to see that he is texting his mother. as i read the few words that i see, the words are you feeling better?, and no, I am still sick in bed are in my sight of vision. wait, does the big bad wolfhard have a heart? i mean, probably only for his mother, but still, he cares.
he moves his phone away from me and squints his eyes at me. "and what do you think you are doing?" he questions. he looks guilty, as if caring for someone is wrong, or illegal. i turn away and ignore him, to finish my essay. four more words, and i am finished. a sigh escapes my mouth, and i remember that natalia is pregnant. i cannot imagine the thoughts that are running through her mind.
grabbing my paper, i walk to the desk in which natalia sits. "hey, do you want me to grade the essays?" i ask, because i know that she trusts me enough to let me handle the grading.
"no- wait actually, yeah. yes please." she says, her hands shakily grabbing the papers on her desk and handing them to me."hey, class, when you finish your essays, give them to millie. she is going to grade them today while i question my existence." natalia says, which earns a couple of confused laughs from the class. relatable i heard someone say. i take my seat, papers in hand, and start reading the essay on the top.
the title eating healthy; is it possible? is written very unneatly across the top of the paper. as i read the essay, i notice many spelling errors and uncapitalized words (a/n hmm kinda sounds like my writing haha).
what an idiot! who the hell wrote this shit?
i look at the top left corner and see the initials f.w. oh my, i think. as i write a 'd' next to the title, someone leans over my shoulder.
"why did you give me that god awful grade bitch?" he says, and i reply with, "because it's the grade you deserved. your writing is awful. i am sure that your mother would be very disappointed in you." his face flashes pale, and his eyes look hurt. for a split second i feel guilt, but luckily, it is quickly replaced with hatred. "you don't know a thing about me, slut." the second he says that, i feel tears in my eyes. he has never called me a slut before, and let me tell you that it hurt.
the bell rings and i get up and return the essays to natalias desk. "sorry, natty. i promise i will be back during detention time to grade them." i say, and she just gives me a grateful smile.
the class is now empty, and i stride back to my seat to grab my books and binders. i exit the classroom and go to my next class.for the rest of the school time, i don't talk to finn and he doesn't talk to me.
-
the second i hop on my bed, i pull out my book, it; by stephen king. after i read misery, i had to read it.
why would beverlys father call her a slutchild- oh wait- okay nevermind
this thought causes me to recall finns earlier sentence, the one where he calls me a slut. if you ever, and i mean ever think it is okay to call a girl a slut, there needs to be some changes in your life. what he said hurt me. but then again, we all have problems that no one knows about. for example, his mother. is she sick? i can't remember all that well.
the urge to get a breath of fresh air flows through my head like water being poured into a cup. i put the book on the bed and get up.
once i am out the door, i immediately feel better. i walk down the steps on the porch and walk briskly down the driveway, eager to relax in this walk.
i grab my phone and earbuds out of my pocket and play my music.the familiar tune of 'ILYSB' by LANY plays and i hum to it. sometimes i will just walk out of my house and wander, whether it is just in the neighborhood or miles away, it is always fun. my walks can take hours, and sometimes i will be gone a full day. that happened twice before, but eventually i called sadie to come and get me in whatever city i get to.
my feet walk on the pavement, and turn left at the stoplight, seen as i am already a mile away from my house. when i wander, i don't even think about where i am going, or what i am doing, my feet just go where they want.
i look up from the ground, after about twenty-two minutes of traveling, just in time to see the beginning of the woods. the mini waterfall that i always come to if i ever need to be alone is just about two miles from the entrance to the woods, so i decide to head that way.
damn, i left IT at home. i always bring a book with me when i go to the waterfall. ugh i am such an idiot.
oh well.
my shoes crunch the leaves beneath them as i walk through the trees. oddly, that is not the only noise i hear.
it is probably just a dumb animal, millie. don't think too much.
it sounds almost human like- wait that is a human. he is laughing? no- that's not it- he is crying.
who is it? alone in the woods?
- ten minutes earlier -
finns pov;
my mom
she's gone
i am alone
what do i do?as my dead mother lay in my arms, i panic. i feel tears spill through my eyes, and my lips are soon covered in the salty substance. the tears fall onto my mothers cheek, then run down her face.
i am so GODDAMN STUPID! I SHOULD HAVE TAKEN HER TO A FRICKEN DOCTOR! WHAT IF SHE HAD A DISEASE?
and then the thought that i think most now, runs through my head;
what if the illness was curable?
this is all my fault
what do i do?
where will i go?i call the hospital, just in case she can be brought back somehow, but i know that that is not physically possible. you can't bring the dead back to life.
when the call ends, i realise i cannot be here when they take her away. i can't just watch the most important person in my life being taken away to be pronounced dead.
so, with that, i lay my mother on the bed, as if she were just peacefully dreaming away. i run out the door and slam it, tears still on my face.
i need to be alone, i need to cry. where can i be alone? the woods? yes. i know a place. it is by a waterfall. perfect for letting go of emotions.
i make it to the woods and run even faster towards the waterfall. within about 7 minutes, i hear the water rushing down the small cliff.
i sit down on the warm rock and start to bawl.
"mother," i whisper in between sobs, "why'd you have to leave me momma? you were that last person that loved me. i loved you, mommy. you left me."
i cry a little more until i hear footsteps behind me.
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hi there. thank u 4 reading my trash.
HAHAHa....ha...heh :(
