François made some final adjustments with Andie's hair, clucked with pleasure like a pale lavender-suited mother hen, held up his "iPad of the future" and clicked. A tiny Andie hologram snapped into existence between them, hovered for an instant before disappearing into the device. "For my collection. Sometimes I blind myself with my own brilliance."
The music cut abruptly. Captain Lieder stepped away from the pulpit and held out his arms wide. "Come to me, my children."
Sterling stood close to the captain, beaming at Talia as if they were best friends. Which they certainly were not. A filament of cold skittered up Andie's spine and the hairs on her neck stiffened. What had come over Sterling? The sooner Andie got the two of them off this ship, the better. It was as if her friend had drunk the proverbial Kool-Aid. The word "wrong" repeated inside her brain in a constant loop.
Wrong.
Like accounts not in balance.
Wrong.
Like not requiring two signatures on a large check.
Wrong.
Like failing to amortize a fixed asset.
"Ugh! How about saying it's like the feeling you get when you see a broken bone splintering through flesh?" Bad Andie supplied.
"That's disgusting."
"Not as disgusting as your incessant accounting metaphors. You lack imagination," Bad Andie said. "We need a vacation. Somewhere warm. Silly cocktails. Great sex. Like we had with Oliver." Bad Andie sighed.
The object of Bad Andie's regret bowed stiffly to his father, while his bride sprinted into the Captain's arms like a drunk toddler, nearly toppling the large man. Andie could not imagine a less enthusiastic future Amu princess. Oliver plucked Talia off of his father by the scruff of her barely there gown. Andie's own fingers clenched into fists, simulating the movement. In her fantasy, she would grab Talia and fling her out the stained glass window into outer space.
From its perch next to the lectern, Captain Lieder grasped a jeweled scepter, topped with a sharp-edged emerald cross and a heart-shaped diamond as big as a ... well ... heart. It looked like something she once saw in the Tower of London. The Captain pointed it at the "happy" couple.
"You may proceed, my son."
Andie held her breath. So did the audience. Oliver slowly unbuttoned his tunic, Talia tapping her diamond-encrusted stiletto the whole time. Each tap tap tap of her bedazzled shoe sent a splatter of rainbow light glinting across the stage.
Finally, Talia yanked Oliver's jacket from his torso, ripping the sleeves. The audience gasped, presumably when they caught sight of Oliver's perfectly defined abs and smooth, godlike skin. The females in the audience were literally drooling over Oliver. A few of them extracted gripples from hidden pockets in their candy-toned gowns. Once again, Andie imagined pulling out Talia's hair strand by strand or perhaps gouging her eyes out with the matrimonial scepter to mix it up a bit. A low growl rumbled from her throat.
"Rawr!" François smiled, clawing the air, and shot Andie a look of deep approval.
Having an ally in this strange environment, coupled with the fact that the females in the audience were all shooting dagger eyes of loathing at Talia, helped Andie get hold of her jealousy. Plus, powerful emotions would cause a slipshod rescue. "Stay on target," Andie murmured under her breath, quoting the line from the Star Wars Episode IV climax.
"Climax," Bad Andie pined. "I remember those."
Andie rolled her eyes. But part of her thought maybe Sterling had been right. Girls who quote science fiction don't get laid. At least not for long.
YOU ARE READING
My Crazy Hot Interstellar Affair
Science Fiction[This story is now FREE!] When Andie Bank agreed to take a job to help save her friend's reputation, it wasn't supposed to end up in a romance-fueled galactic rescue mission with her irresistibly hot boss. ...
