Healing Hailey

James

Did she just break up with me? After my shock I look down and see Hailey driving away, there is no point in following now. I look down at the envelope in my hand and I sigh. It's marked 3 but it is in blue ink, not black, she must have written this another time. I turn it around to open it, it was marked for one week ago.

James,
He was perfect. He cared for me when I thought only my cat could. He has this stupid crooked smile and this lazy happiness that is more addictive than any drug.

He is you James. You are perfect in my eyes. And I am terrified to say, I love you.

I must admit that some of the cause of my worry is the fact that you have ignored me the last two weeks. But worry is an understatement on how I felt thinking about what you could be doing.

The other reason I am scared is because the last time I said that was to Harry. And we'll, we both know what he did.

I want to tell you how I decided to leave him. After one night of a drug fueled beating I looked at a picture of my dad and I and I remembered my happiness. And I knew that I deserved to be happy, so I decided to leave, so I could be happy.

You make me happy. And that scares me. But I trust you. So thank you.

~Your Hailey.

My mouth hangs open. What have I done?

I jump down the ladder and I run to my car. I look in the mirror and see the box of Hailey's stuff. That should get us to talk.

I drive to her place, going slightly over the speed limit, trying to get there as fast as possible without getting pulled over.

Once at her building I see that her car is not there. I go to her front door and knock. I hear the cat meowing and scratching at the door slightly but no sign of Hailey. I close my eyes and sit with my head on the door. I sigh and try calling her. Straight to voicemail.

I sit there for half an hour but she does not arrive. I call the one person I can.

"Hello?" Her voice asks on the other end.

"Hi mum." I say sadly.

"What's wrong my son?" She asks

"I think Hailey dumped me. She is not at her place and she won't answer my calls." I say, not caring that my voice cracks with sadness.

"James, come home and we can talk about this. Yeah? It will give her time and you can calm down." She says. I agree and hang up. I put the box by her door and I walk back to my car.

As I drive to my place my headache grows. I love her too, I can't stand it when someone I love hates me.

My mum and I talk for an hour before I can't take it anymore. I ruined everything. I was too busy with Harry, my mum and everything he was giving me I forgot about Hailey. I forgot about Hailey.

I go to my room and play my guitar. My calloused fingers are used to the abuse that they get from playing but this time is different. They actually hurt. Maybe it is because I've been too busy to play, or it is because I am playing so hard. Either way, it does not hurt as much as hurting Hailey feels.

My phone buzzes with a text.

Thanks it reads. It is from Hailey. She must have seen the box. I instantly start writing my long reply. I cannot stop saying how sorry I am. But it does not matter. Once sent I get a message saying I have been blocked.

Before I can process this there is a knock at my door. I take a deep breath and open the door.

"James, I was wondering if you want to go out? I found this cool place where you can get this awesome training." Harry says. I suck in my cheeks slightly and bite the flesh.

"I would rather die." I growl.

"What got into you?" Harry asks with an amused tone.

"I know what you did to Hailey." I spit. "I've known this whole time. Which makes me just as bad. Now Hailey hates me, just fully. So I am going to close my door and figure out a way to get her back before it is too late." I say and slam my door in the very shocked face of Harry.

I lay in my bed and rub my face as my headache grows. I lay on my side and look at one of the few pictures I have of Hailey and I sigh.

I slept through school the next day. I was surprised at first as I usually got a text from Hailey, telling me that I should come to school to wake me up. But once awake I realized I was having a nightmare.

I go back to Hailey's and I stayed there knocking but not even the cat made a noise. I only left when the neighbors complained.

I slept at a bus stop, not wanting to be near Harry. My hatred for him growing with my sadness for Hailey.
I go to school the next day. Happy that the first lesson is English, a class Hailey and I share, maybe because I was not there yesterday she will think I won't be today. Therefore making it more likely for her to be there today.

"Ok class, we will be reading our short poems. I know no one wants to be first so I will start." The teacher says. I sigh.

"Ms?" I ask before she starts.

"Yes James?" She sighs.

"Shouldn't we wait for Hailey?" I ask.

"Well we would be waiting a long time. She doesn't go here anymore. This is her poem so just pretend she is here." She says. My mouth stays open but I stay silent.

"I'm not sure what went wrong
But I know I don't deserve this
You can't just lead me on
You can't just string me along

You have a way with your lips
and the lies that creep out of them
I know I don't deserve this
You can't just build me up
to watch me tumble"

I walk out of English straight away. Everyone cries here, but I can't. I am not weak. I go to Ms Sages office and slam the door closed.

"Where is Hailey?" I ask.

"Nice to see you too." She says with an annoyed tone.

"Where is she?" I ask, getting sad as I sit down. Ms sage sighs and tucks her chair in.

"She worked hard James. She graduated and left. I don't know where she went but when I told her she was eligible to leave she was excited to tell you. Didn't she tell you?" She asks.

"No." I say wiping the tears that are about to fall. "She dumped me instead." I say.

"Oh James." She says sympathetically. I rub my face and rub my hand through my hair. and safe comes to my side and bends down. Putting her hand on my shoulder. "Here is what I suggest. Not because I am a teacher. But because I care." She says.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"Graduate for her. Find her and show her you care. You can do it and win her back. I know I said that I thought your relationship was unhealthy but you both are so much happier and healthier together, I just didn't see it. So, will you do it?" She asks. I nod slowly. For Hailey.