"Moon Man, come quickly, I've found the possible location of Michael Jordan" Moon Man came running in. "The coordinates are -3675920, 25962548, you have to go quickly, we can't waste any more time!"
Moon Man and Bugs soon ran towards the phallic looking space ship called "The Succulent Spaghettini".
"Why is it called that?" asked Moon Man.
"It's an Italian thing... you wouldn't understand."
"Oh"
"What you got a problem with that you racist fuck."
"No, No, No it's okay."
Moon Man walked up the steps of the ship, gazing at the array of colored lights emitting from the control buttons.
"How do I ship?" asked Moon Man
"Ugh Jesus Christ I thought that you were like a spaceman."
"No, I am Moon Man. Space men and Moon Men have many differences."
"I don't care, Doc. Now since you don't know how to ship, I shall drive."
Bugs inserted his furry dick into a little hole below the steering wheel.
"The penis is the power source to all spaceships, you know."
This is why all spaceships are phallically shaped. But back to the story.
The ship slowly lifted up, and Bugs and Moon Man busted a mighty fat nut, allowing them to transport to the galaxy that contained the coordinates.
"Man, that was quite a good nut." said Moon Man.
As they traveled through space, Moon Man thought of the wonderful nut he had previously had. They approached the planet, but as they entered the atmosphere, something went wrong. The engines had cut out just as they were preparing to land. The ship's exterior became engulfed in flames as they braced for impact on the unknown planet's surface.
They landed unexpectedly softly.
"Man, I was expecting that to be so much worse." said Bugs.
All of the sudden, half the ship just fuckin exploded into like a bajillion pieces. Bugs just stared at it for a while and said, "Welp, at least we have the other side."
The two started walking around on the strange, oddly moist planet.
As they continued Bugs became slower and slower, and eventually he collapsed onto a pile of macaroni and cheese that just happened to be lying around. All of a sudden, an alarm sounded, and figures in black ninja suits surrounded them, appearing from nothing but smoke.
The ninjas joined hands as they sang:
Moist Boyz
Moist Boyz
We are wet
We are succulent
We are wet
We need egg
To sustain today
'Cause we are the Moist Boyz
Charlie mucho the ultra big boy grande gay
One of the ninjas smelled Bugs and Moon Man and said, "The faggots are reeking."
The ninjas then knocked out Moon Man as Bugs collapsed from exhaustion from becoming Buff Bunny. Moon Man then awoke seeing the great Sage Scrimmy Bingus, which was strange because he should have been at the lower right quadrant of Scruple Trumdersquandge.
"What are you doing here Moon Man." said the salty yet slightly spicy Scrimmy Bingus.
"To be honest, I don't know." said Bugs. "This story is so goddamn confusing."
Moon Man then turned to bugs and looked him in the eyes, "Da Fuq you were literally passed out just 10 seconds ago."
"I told you to never return to me Moon Man, EVER. Especially after what you did to me,"
"Look Moon Man... LOOK AT THE PERMANENT DAMAGE YOU CAUSED TO MY BEAUTIFUL GODLY BEANIE." Scrimmy's face was as red as an apple or some dudes balls if you squeeed them real hard or whatever. "I can never forgive you."
"It was just a prank, bro." screamed Moon Man.
"I HATE YOU!" screamed Scrimmy. He exploded into light as his clothes completely changed appearance. He wore a black leather jacket and jeans with $150 sunglasses covering his eyes from the potentially harmful UV rays, as the ozone layer is thinning, (they were really nice). He was also covered in moist liquid.
"Silly boy," exclaimed Scrimmy. "Not only am I the powerful sage Scrimmy Bingus, but I am also known as the leader of the Moist Boyz, BIG MOIST!"
Bugs screamed , " You Fucking dick you were the one who stole my coffee and monsters you pick of shit. FUCKING SEX!!!!!!!"
"Yes it was I who stole your shit because I need to slightly inconvenience everyone before I take over the universe " Emoted Big Moist who then immediately started to awkwardly laugh with no skill.
"Prepare to feel my rath Moon Man... everything has led up to this moment, where I destroy your moist spagooter for slightly tearing my beanie."
Moon Man could hardly do anything without his Big Mac Sword, for he left it in the ship that had exploded. All he needed was his flying piano.
"What do I do Bugs? I need my piano!" said Moon Man, hurriedly.
"Well," started Bugs, "If you close your eyes and believe really hard, your piano will appear."
So Moon Man believed really hard and... presto! His flying piano appeared! Although it was covered in paper and human feces.
"Dude the fuck, why is my piano.."
"Shut up a deity has had possession over your piano and I don't want to talk about him right now."
Moon Man then got on his piano and started quoting hitler in a song written by a stupid internet angsty teen. This made Big Moist literally dry up and become shredded with tasty ass jams. And the battle will commence in the next saga.
YOU ARE READING
SQUEE OR EXDEE - THE ACTUAL NEW TESTAMENT THAT THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO HEAR
HumorHey everyone, this is something that me and my friends Charlie and Luca wrote together. We were talking about putting it online, so I guess I'll just do it for them. This piece has been basically abandoned, so it doesn't have an ending. But any-who...
