My not so Perfect Love

CHAPTER 4.5: Alone

*Maxx’s point of view

                Beyond the forest, amongst the woods lies a certain pavilion hidden through a waterfall. I was holding some girl’s hand. She was dressed in white, barefooted. Gloating, we kept running until our legs gave up and landed our bodies in a huge pile of dandelions. We were laughing. It felt like one of those perfect days. Just being with this girl made me exhausted but happy.

                She looked at me with a soft gaze, her hair covering parts of her face. “Maxx.” She called; her voice so tender and sweet. “I love y--------IIIIIIING! RIIIIIING! RIIIIIIIING!”

                I woke up realizing it was already 10 in the morning. “What a weird dream.” I said. Sigh. “Good morning, Tophee.” I patted my dog. We don’t have classes today because it’s a holiday. The house was so quiet and dim that I decided to do all my chores to keep me busy. My parents weren’t home until dinner so I had nothing to do. I had no one else to talk to. I felt alone.

I thought to myself ‘why?’. Why did ‘she’ do it? Why didn’t she pick me? but then I’ll be hurting myself. I hated relationships since that very moment. Times like these are when I go have a chat with Al but it might seem impossible right now.  Then it hit me, we’re friends after all! So I immediately went to Al’s place.

Knock. Knock. “Oh, what a surprise! Just go ahead upstairs.” Al’s mom proceeded. “ Al! Maxx is here!”

When I got to her room, she was still asleep thus I threw a pillow right at her gaunt face. “Still sleeping during mid-day, I see.”

“ (Oaf) Can you blame me? I got exhausted knowing you’re back in town.” She tugged over her blanket.

                “Ha-ha. Very funny. Get ready, we’re going somewhere.”

“Psh. Where?”

I got near her face and said “That’s for me to know and for you to find out” then I poked her nose. I do it to irritate her and amuse myself as well. She always blush every time I did that. It’s kinda cute.

After getting ready, we head to a book sale near a mall. “So you dragged me away from my perfect mid-day nap just to help you pick a book? Real romantic, Maxx. I’m impressed.” I chuckled.  “You’re one to talk. What girl wears tattered jeans on a date?”

“Asuuuuuus, this isn’t a date. If it was, it wouldn’t be in a book store.” We laughed. Everything went on normal. Well, our definition of normal that is. I bought this book about Trigonometry and saw Al looking at some too. That is a miracle. Ha-ha. I popped up behind her and asked “You found something?”

“Ah, uhh oh it’s nothing.”

                “Oh c‘mon, let’s see it.” I stifled. “What, that? My perfect love story? are you a hopeless romantic or something? There isn’t even such thing in reality. Just put it back.”

“Oh, stop it. It’s just a figure of speech. It’s like saying the perfect love story is full with the imperfections we accept. Read the back part first, don’t judge~ I’m buying it.“ she took her tongue out.

Realizing, of course she won’t understand I was feeling. Never has she understood me. It’s like if I look at her, she looks the other way. I guess that is how it should be.

“Hey, don’t get mad. Uyyyy~ you know you look prettier when you’re mad.” I teased. She then smacks me on the head with the same book.

Ah, nothing has really changed. That expression on her face, I feel as if she only shows it to me but she should have found someone new to be that way with, someone perfect for her. Though no matter how hard one tries to get rid of the love you feel, your first love would always have a special place in your heart. In whatever it all might turn out in the end.

“Al, I’ll be going first. I forgot to feed Tophee today.” I excused.

                “Wow, you leave a girl just like that?”

“Al.” he moaned.

                “I get it. I get it. You go on ahead.”

“Thank you!!!” I quickly ran back until I realized I forgot something, my Trigonometry book.  “Al!” I yelled. She turned around and smirked. Ohoho, so she knew I forgot. She looked rather victorious making me look like a fool. Classic Alison tricks.

I chased after her as she holds the book upon her chest. “Slowpoke!” she exclaimed. “Aha, give me it !” I finally caught up with her, hugging her to stop her from running some more.

The moment of impact. It was our first hug in so many years. It felt relieving but I should stop. “Ha, you’re too slow. C’ya tomorrow, Al!” we waved goodbye.

Weird. It felt very normal but at the same time empty. Was there something I missed in the past two years?

It was still too early to go back so I went to this place Al and I used to go to. It hasn’t changed. The swing was still there. I took a seat and remembered every single memory we had. We had such a great story. She saved me from some bullies, we became friends and almost became lovers. I courted her for years but it always end up the same way. But when we were seniors, she answered me but then I thought she is my best friend, I couldn’t think of myself even hurting her. And I’m afraid I really would. I’m a coward but its fine.

I found a girl later on who I thought I really love but she ended up leaving me. I couldn’t stop feeling so hurt, that is why I went back. And now, I’m back at square one.

“I’m going home.”

I got back around 5 in the afternoon and saw someone waiting outside the house. He was wearing a hoody and put his foot against our gate. “Hey, you. Who are you and what are you doing in front of my house?” I asked. He then faced me and took his hoody off.

“Fletcher?”