Rebirth {Marauders Era}

CHAPTER 20: JAMES: UNFORGIVING

The next day James noticed a change in Sirius' demeanor. The boy was now doing anything to try and get on James' good side, but James wasn't having it. It might've seemed conceited to others but James felt deeply betrayed and simply needed a few days to let everything stew and settle. Even as they walked to dinner Sirius plead on.

"Please, I promise you'll know everything!" Sirius whined. "Just do this one thing for me, alright?"

"No, Padfoot." James said gruffly. He looked at Remus and felt a pang of guilt. Both Remus and Peter were extremely upset and torn, he knew that. Both supported their mates, but at the same time they were forced to take sides as the fighting commenced. Right now pain flashed in both Remus and Sirius's eyes and he turned away, sighing. "I'm sorry Padfoot, I need to know I can trust you."

During dinner, he sat with Lily and her friends, including Mary and Marlene.

He could feel Sirius and the other boys looking at him, but he didn't dare turn his head and acknowledge them in any way.

"So Lily, how's life?" He asked casually. The look she flashed him was slightly angry, and a little amused, which he found was a strange combination.

"James, we literally saw each other ten minutes ago, what a strange thing to say." She paused, then punched him in the arm. Marls and Mary looked over, and Marlene cheered.

"Go Lily! Show him who's boss!"

"That's not fair!" James scowled at her. "If I was to hit a girl, nobody would be cheering me on, I'd be frowned at."

"Well maybe I'm using that as an excuse to get something through that thick skull of yours, Potter." Lily's green eyes flashed dangerously and James leaned back. "Don't go turning your back on your mates, now more than ever! You have to forgive Sirius, he did try and confess, and you yelled at him! I can't believe I stood by and did nothing. Look, I love sitting next to you, James, but if you think that I'm unaware of why you're doing it, well..."

When James hesitated she nudged him. "Go talk to him, Jamesie, and maybe you'll feel better."

"You're right, Lils, but I think I'll wait till we're in the privacy of our own dorm." James looked down. "I just felt so hurt, and I know it sounds spoiled and bratty, but I can't believe he didn't tell me, of all people."

"There's your problem, and it seems to be a running theme with you, Potter." Lily leaned against him, smiling as he looked at her. "Ego, or at least having an over inflated ego. You aren't the most important being in the universe. If Sirius didn't want to share with you, it was nothing against you. He didn't tell anyone else either. Even if he did, he still trusts you, but maybe he won't always come running to you first. He has got other friends, y'know."

"I know." James muttered, and they all turned to their meal with no more words.

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"I'm sorry." Sirius murmured, laying on his bed and staring into space. James was also looking at the ceiling, but when hie best mate spoke he turned and looked at him.

"I know." He watched as Sirius tensed. "It's I who should be apologizing. I've been unforgiving."

"It's only been one day, Prongsie." Sirius laughed, his eyes sparkling. "I knew you'd come around eventually. And don't worry, I have a plan that's going to end all this nonsense."

James shook his head with a slight laugh. "I wonder what that is, Pads."

"You'll have to find out." Sirius said, waggling his eyebrows. Remus walked in from the common room at that moment.

"Do I even want to know what you two are talking about?" He asked cautiously, and instantly he realized that wasn't the right question. "Wait, don't answer that! I don't want to know!"

"We won't tell you if you don't want Moony, but I think you're missing out." Sirius said. James watched, a detached humor filling him as his mates bickered. Exhaustion filled him, he looked up and saw it wasn't that late. Well, Lily had woken him up late last night. He laid back and turned off his lamp, whispering a goodnight to his other mates who were still talking in hushed voices.

He was awoken much later, after midnight, by movement in the dorm. He grabbed his wand, not eager to repeat last night. When he lit up the room with it, he saw Sirius creeping out, the invisibility cloak tucked under his arm.

"Hey!" He whisper-yelled. "That's mine, what're you doing Padfoot?"

Sirius froze and looked back, his eyes apologetic. "I'm going somewhere."

"Well that's specific mate, I could tell you that anytime. Where are you going with my cloak?"

"Uh-" Sirius looked lost. "I was-er-just leaving to go somewhere important. I need some scissors."

Unfortunately for Sirius, James was putting the dots together faster than Sirius could get away.

"Wait!" He scrambled after his friend. "You can't go to find Morta! She's in the middle of enemy territory, Voldemort has her under constant watch! You'll be killed."

"I'm going to die anyways." Sirius looked at him, and James' heart sunk at the dark determined look in his eyes. "So what's there to lose?"

"I don't know, at least twenty more years of life, you can't do this Sirius!" He could see Sirius struggling to come to a conclusion, but then he looked up at his mate.

"I can't bear what the future holds. I'm going to find Morta. And you cannot stop me."

James couldn't keep a hold on him then, as Sirius sprinted out of the common room and away from him.

"Bloody idiot!" James swore. He ran back into the dorm, shaking Remus and Peter, waking them.

"What's this about?" Remus mumbled. "I'm trying to sleep."

"You can sleep later, Moony, cause we have a big problem. Sirius is going to find Morta! He's going to get himself killed."

"He's doing what!"