Rules of a Rebel

Chapter 35: Plan C

Mission: Get Rid of Peyton's Crush on Archer 

Plan C - Get a Crush on Somebody Else 

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You know what the problem with this mission is? 

Archer. 

He's just too damn perfect. Now that I think about it, it isn't surprising that I would get a crush on him. He's handsome, he's kind, he's funny, he has pets and he lives right next door to me. Me getting a crush on him was inevitable.

In fact, I bet half of the people who know Archer have a crush on him. And based on how many people Archer knows, I bet he has a crush on some of them too. 

I'm basically setting myself up for rejection here. 

So, what I need to do now is: get a crush on somebody much more attainable.

But how do I get a crush on somebody else during Winter Break? 

The opportunity presents itself on Christmas Eve. 

Apparently, it's a tradition in this neighborhood that people from the surrounding houses drop by ours and trade presents. Mom needed somebody to open the door and greet people when they walk up. 

Naturally, I signed up.

Grandmother nearly had a heart attack when she saw me tugging a Santa Claus hat on - "You want to put her at the door? A Christian holiday should not have somebody with so many sins representing our family! - but since nobody else volunteered, I got the job. 

After grandmother, grumbling as always, stomps to her room to take a morning nap, I set my plan into action. 

Peyton's Plan C: Get a Crush on Somebody Else 

1) Hang up mistletoe, that I bought for two dollars at Walmart, in the doorway. Scope for potential, crush-quality, targets 

2) Call attention to the mistletoe when target is in sight. 

3) Whoever gives me butterflies in my stomach will replace Archer as my new crush. 

I have the best plans. 

So while everybody's wrapping up the last of our presents, I grab a ladder and put it next to the doorstop so I can put the mistletoe in the prime kissing place. Bettie finds me just as I'm applying the sixth layer of tape on. 

"Why are you putting that up?" 

"I'm trying to kiss as many people as possible. Anyone and everyone."

"Go Peyton!" James, who's walking by with a box full of broken ornaments, because he fell on them, cheers. "That's the holiday spirit!" 

The new piece of tape is stuck to my fingers. I try to shake it off.  

Bettie has a sour expression on her face. "You've been acting weird these past few days."

"I'm a slut, remember? This is what sluts do on Christmas." 

Bettie doesn't respond. 

"Why are you still here?" I say, stepping off the ladder. She's still standing in the same spot as last time. "I thought you were in charge of giving the presents to the neighbors who come by." 

"Grandmother told me to guard you and make sure you don't do anything suspicious." 

"Do you always do what grandmother tells you?"

Before she can respond, our doorbell rings. We separate. I swing open the door to reveal couple with no children. They don't even notice the mistletoe as they step inside of the house, shivering.