Crazy House

Chapter 28: you would've been up shit creek without a paddle

Chapter 28: you would’ve been up shit creek without a paddle

 

For a second I’m frozen in place, and then I start to think to television shows when they use guns. What do they always check for?

 

The safety.

 

I slide the little button which I’m guessing is the safety, and I point it at the door. I’ve watched enough action movies to know a little bit. Whoever comes in that door is getting shot.

 

There’s banging on the door, and I almost jump off the couch.

 

Shit.

 

I wish the action movies would teach you how to not be scared.

 

“It’s me!” There’s more banging and I realize it’s aunt Lauren, and I stand up keeping the gun aimed at the floor. I think about the gunshot, and how maybe Lauren could have been the one shot, so I hurry to the door. I fling it open and she comes in with the shotgun in hand. She looks pissed but there’s not site of blood. I close the door behind her, and lock it.

 

“I have to call my brother.” She says and it takes me a while to realize she’s talking about my dad. “You stay right there, he’s gone but keep the gun ready, just don’t shoot me.” And with that she goes off into the back room to use the phone.

 

Lauren comes back out of the room, and despite the fact that someone just tried to break into her house she gives me a smile. It’s not one of those reassurance smiles, it’s one of those smiles that says she finds something funny. “If someone would have came in her, you would’ve been up shit creek without a paddle.”

 

Wow.

 

Isn’t she just lovely?

 

“It’s not my fault that I’ve never had to shoot a gun a day in my life.” I tell her passing her the gun when she reaches out for it.

 

“No, because you grew up weak and spoiled.” She says shaking her head.

 

I grew up weak and spoiled? She barely knows me, and plus it’s obvious she grew up rich. Just as I’m about to point this out there’s banging on the door.

 

“It’s Edmond.” She says standing up, and even though she knows it’s my dad she checks the peephole before letting him and Roman in.

 

My dad storms into the house, and makes a beeline for me. “Are you okay?” He asks pulling me to my feet, and examining me.

 

“I’m fine.” I tell him, and he nods before letting me go. He gives me a kiss on my cheek and pulls me into a tight hug.

 

He checks on aunt Lauren and then he starts to pace and shake his head. Roman walks over to me with a worried look, and I begin to worry about what happened with him and my dad. Roman hugs me to his chest, and I feel all the tension in my body go out.