sent ➳ phan

107

dan

the whole weekend, i didn't talk to anyone. except mum, maybe.

for two days, i kept my phone off. i didn't want to see any of chris' and pj's insistent messages.   i don't know how much they know about what happened to phil and i. they keep on sending me messages, probably telling me to talk to phil. but i'm not changing my mind. i'm not getting back with him

with a sigh, i put on my black no-face jumper and left for school.

for the first time, i wished i don't run to phil in the hallways.

—

i don't know how many minutes we've been standing here.

right after arriving to school, i immediately went for the restroom. thinking that it was a good idea and it's still very unlikely that phil is there.

but i was so wrong.

phil stood against the sink. his gazed focused on me whilst his mouth slightly agape.

i didn't want to look at his stupidly beautiful eyes so i trained my eyes on his hands which is still positioned under the running tap. it's really pale, almost translucent and— shaking?

"d-dan," he slowly moved his hands under the tap and let it go limp on his sides. he took a hesitant step towards me but i immediately took a step back.

"sorry i, uh, have to—"

"no, please stay." his voice broke at the end. "i really have to tell you something." i really miss hearing his voice, but not when it sounds so hurt. i just want to alter my love into something tangible and give it to him so he can stop sounding so broken.

no, dan. he cheated on you. don't feel sorry for him.

"okay, i'm listening" i crossed my arms on my chest, "but i'm still not getting back with you" his face fell.

how dare he look like that when he was the one who cheated on me?

"i love you dan, i couldn never cheat on you." he gulped, "i know you deserve someone better because i sure as hell don't deserve you." is he making the break up official?

even though, i'm the one who broke it off, i felt a pang on my chest.

"but gail, i'm not— i don't." he bit his lip, contemplating of what to say next. "i'm not with gail. i never was."

"do you really expect me to believe that?" i let out an indignant huff.

"it might seem—"

"i said we're over. i'm not believi—"

"dan! she's my stepsister!"

i feel like everything around me stopped.

stepsister?

"my mum and his dad went to france for holiday, that's why i'm staying with her for now. i don't know if you'll believe me but i'm telling the truth. " he continuously took steps forward until he's right in front of me, but this time, i didn't take a step back. "i'm not expecting you to come back. i know i've been such a—" before he could finish his sentence, i grabbed the back of his neck and smashes his lips into mine.

he let out a tiny noise of surprise but eventually wrapped my arms against my waist as i wrapped mine properly on his neck. he kissed back with just as much fervor but this time, it was rougher, it was hot.

he pulled a way for a bit and pushed me against the wall, only to dive back and press his lips into mine once again. i gasped at the sensation. he took this as a chance to slip his tongue on my mouth. i whimpered, pressing my body flush in his.

it was me who pulled away to breathe. but phil is too impatient. immediately latching his lips on my neck, sucking harshly. i let out an embarrassingly high-pitched moan. i feel my knees starting to buckle. i probably would have fall down if it wasn't for the arms supporting me.

i gripped tightly on the material of his shirt whilst he work on my neck. i bit my lip, trying to hold the noises but not succeeding.

there was a time when i moaned too loudly, if anyone was outside this restroom, i'm certain they heard it. phil brought a finger to my lips, asking me to quiet down as he kiss on my neck. he bit down on it, hard and i couldn't hold the noises in. but he was quick to bring his lips back to mine to muffle the noises. and this time, the kiss was sweeter.

i pulled away and rested my head on his chest as i wrap my arms on his torso.

"i love you, phil. i love you."

—

grae: are you happy now