What I Have Left

Ch.6 ( Theodore )

I can see how nervous Noah was. I  know they were self harming cuts. Though Cody beat him I know he didn't cut him with a knife or razor.

I couldn't help but think this is all my fault. I caused him to do this to himself. I am at fault here. With that thought I felt self pitying tears form in my eyes because of how much of a bad person I was to Noah.

"Those ..." I heard a small raspy voice. I looked up at Noah and saw that it was him trying to talk. 

" Do you need to water?" I asked worriedly

He shook his head and continued." Those are cu-ts t-hat I did to my-self to c-ope with everything." He said with tears forming in his eyes. I missed his voice so much. I could tell it has matured even though his voice is still husky from not talking for a while. Then I realized what he said and I couldn't help butfeel a sharp pain in my chest.  " I coul-dn't take it all. The lonli-ness was un-barable. I turne-d to cut-ting. It was eit-her that or ..." He let me fill in the blank.

I knew what he was going to say and I couldn't believe it. I started shaking and feeling so horrible. "I am evil. How could I cause all this? How could I let this happen? You are already depressed and I knew that. I just let you get hit and kicked everyday. I did nothing. How can you still look at me, after what I have done? " I said all of this as tears and snot was running down my face.

"I ha-ve learned to for-give. I already have to much stre-ss. I just need to let it go." he said wisely.

"I am so sorry Noah. I truly am." I sobbed " If I would have stayed your friend this would have never happened."

I felt warm thin arms wrap around me. I knew they belonged to Noah so I wrapped my arms around him back and I kept telling him I was so sorry.

He was whispering sweet nothings trying to calm me down. That is why I have loved Noah so much over the years. He is nice, calm , and caring. No matter what he forgives you, but he never seems to give himself the same chance.

He is the hardest on himself. One time I remember in seventh grade we had a big test coming up in history worth half our grade. Noah study for days upon days until the test. He missed two problems and he was down about for about a week until I couldn't take it anymore and gave him a stern talking to.

Back to what I was saying, how much I love him. I am surprised he hasn't realized it yet. After the kiss this weekend, I would have thought he would find me weird. 

After awhile I looked at Noah in the eye and said, " Noah I promise to be by your side forever. No matter what happens. It might just be me and you against the world, but at least we have each other , alright." Noah nodded and gave me a one hundred watt smile.

"I like the sound of that. Me and you."

"I am glad because I wouldn't have it any other way."I said confidently 

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I know some of these might seem alittle shorter but I feel that if  I made them longer you would lose the connection that they had.

There is a Gif on here on how Theo was.. (Note that is not who is playing Theo, if you missed who is playing him go to chapter 3)

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Undercover