Love Bites

Hold me *

After Lexa defeats Roan and kills Nia

I sat in the comfy chair in my lacy white nightgown. When I closed my eyes I still saw Lexa on her back and Roan standing over her, aiming for the kill. It was imprinted on my eyelids like some horrible nightmare. Despite watching terrified in the front row as she skillfully reversed their positions and sent the spear flying at Nia, the Ice Nation Queen; I still was tense and shaky. Lexa and I had fought over her participating in the fight herself a few hours before it'd happened. I'd pleaded and negotiated, but she hadn't listened. She'd gone right ahead anyway, stubborn as always, and I'd shoved my way to the front of the crowd to offer her some support. She'd half smiled at me.

"I'm glad you came."

"Me too."

Seeing her black blood dripping from her nose and sliding down her wrist from the gash on her palm had made my stomach roll.
As soon as the fight had ended and Lexa was safe, I'd fled to my room to be sick in private.
Now, I stared blankly at the candles as they flickered in the low light. I was thinking about the first time Lexa had kissed me.

It was after she'd talked with Clarke on the plan for attacking Mt. Weather. We'd been interrupted by her people yelling for her to come see the signal from Bellamy. We'd promised to finish that kiss after we beat the mountain.
When she'd left us there to die, I was devastated. Lexa had betrayed me. And it hurt, a lot. But I knew Clarke would have done the same thing, much to my protests, if our positions had been reversed. But still, I ached inside.
After Clarke and I pulled that lever, she'd stayed with our people while I took off into the woods. Months later, I hadn't expected to slam into Lexa herself as I left the trading post. I had tried to run, but she caught me easily. We'd returned to Polis where it took Lexa a good two weeks to convince me to see her. Another three for me to forgive her. And just one more for me to fall in love with her. We'd kissed again after she'd enforced the kill order and Octavia and Clarke tried to convince me to go with them. I told them no, and they left. When I went to tell Lexa I wanted to stay, upon seeing me she assumed I was leaving. When I informed her otherwise, she kissed me, and we had stumbled towards her bed, falling back on it. I didn't mind. We'd stayed under those furs for the rest of the night. Titus expressed his dislike of me openly, but I honestly didn't care. The weeks since then had been great. Finally, Pike was gone, and Skaikru was whole once more. And still I stayed. Then Lexa had been challenged.