Random emo shit

I'm always here for you?

You tell me you're here for me.
That I'll be safe in your arms.
Your muscles, bone and skin
A warded castle of evil and
I'm the one that must be protected.

But what stones have I moved
That now allows the darkness
To break through into the world
Of light.

I was scared
Crying,
The tears a never ending fountain
Of pain
Shaking,
A thousand shots of nonexistent
Electrical charges pulsing through me
I was afraid
I was dying inside and nothing could
Stop the darkness from consuming me
I was alone cloaked in darkness
With the only company being
Silence,
The tears on my pillow
And an urge to do something
That I'm trying so hard not to do.

You always said I could tell you
That I could confide in you
That you'll always be there 
If I ever decided to open up.

I reached for you,
Screaming for help,
Desperately needing the confort you
Said your arms would hold.
I detailed my problems,

I'm not okay

You mocked me,
You dismissed it
Thinking I was just trying hard to be
With the cool kids
Wearing black and ripped jeans,
Talking about the next release
Dates for albums.

Do you think i would lie about
Not caring if I were buried six
Feet under?

Do you think I would hide the things
I do just because I want to be
"Something I'm clearly not"?

Do you have any idea how hard it
Was to tell you?

To confess the secrets I have locked
Inside for months.

You were the first.

The first to know.
I thought you would
Understand how hard
It is to move on
From the pain.

You just want everything to be novel perfect.
Where the guy heals the girl's soul.
Your misapprehension of reality
Is a fallacy.
You live in a world where you think
What you do helps
But instead you deteriorate the situation.

You realised your mistake of mockery when
I didn't respond.
You acted concerned.
And then proceeded to feed me the same
Bullshit you always do

I'm always here for you
Whenever you need me

Try to get some sleep

You want me to talk to you?

Yet you dismiss me when I come to
Open up.

I was crying out for assistance.

I needed you,
I needed someone in that moment
And you said I'll always be here
I needed you to be here
In that moment

You're just too imprisoned in this
Dreamscape that you're just playing the part,
Not actually, being.

And then within two seconds,
Talking with him,
I felt better.
The shaking ceased,
The tears calming.

That was the moment,
The moment I realised
That I can't anymore.

Sometimes friends are
Better company and
Comforters.