Beloved

Demon Blood

Itwas one of those nights. Jared and I would lay in bed together,cuddling after a very romantic evening filled with lovemaking. And Iam truly talking about making love here. No rough, careless sex butlove and emotions. Little Wyatt was asleep for a couple of hours nowand we expected him to wake up soon because he needed to be fed so wedidn't bother going to sleep just yet. ''I never really asked youbecause I could imagine things myself but...Were all the things thathappened put on you? You know, being in hell and in Lucifer's cageand the trials. Was it all you?'' Jare asked, stroking up and down mylower back. I sighed, looking up at my man. He was so perfect. Everysingle part of him was so good looking and if anyone would tell memen couldn't be pretty, I would tell them to look at my husband andthink again. He was like the perfect prince you would draw a pictureof. Stunning. His eyes were so full of care and love and hisattention was on me like there was nobody else in this whole world tofocus on. ''Most of it.'' I mumbled, drawing the lines of his facewith my fingers. I started with his strong jawbone, up to his soft,slightly pink lips. They were still a bit swollen from our passionatekisses a few minutes ago. It was our first sex after the pregnancyand hell did I miss him. All of him. As dirty as it sounded, I lovedhaving sex with him. But none of that mattered right now. Thisconversation seemed to go deeper than expected but I trusted Jareenough to fully open up for him. Something I wouldn't usually do withother people. But hey, he was my husband, right? There was a reason Imarried him. ''What about the demon blood thing? Was it Sam that gotaddicted or you?'' he asked and when I didn't answer right after hisquestion, he started stammering an apology. ''I'm sorry...It's stupidto ask that. It obviously wasn't a good time in your life. I'm sorry,Liss.'' he whispered, his eyes filling with guilt. I chuckledslightly and ruffled his hair, going back to drawing the lines of hisperfect face. ''It's alright, stop apologising.'' I told my husband,admiring his figure. Candles made sure to drown him into a warm, softlight that made him even more beautiful. ''Actually, it was both ofus who got addicted to the demon blood. We both wanted to killLillith, no matter the costs. So we found two demons that were likesisters and brothers. Ruby was giving Sammy the blood he needed andXavier gave me his blood. Well, they found us, not the other wayaround. We didn't know that the two of them convinced us both at thesame time but found out later, when I caught Sam drinking blood fromRuby.'' I explained, looking into the eyes of the man I loved withall my heart. His eyes were locked with mine, focusing on what I hadto say. For a second, I thought I saw jealousy appearing on hisfeatures but it wasn't like that at all. I saw Xavier more as like agood friend but never a partner like Ruby was for the youngerWinchester. ''It needed the two of us to kill Lillith, since one ofus wasn't strong enough. After a while, a few months before we killedher, Sam and I decided to stop...'' I started, closing my eyes.Memories floded back into my mind. Memories that ripped me up deepinside. Memories I always tried to hide from everyone and everything.

With small, quiet steps I put on my black leatherjacket and opened the door to our motel room. Sam was fast asleep,which gave me the ability to sneak out of the room without anyonenoticing. The younger Winchester and I were sharing a room, since allthe three bed rooms were already taken. I was thirsty. Not thirsty aslike I needed water, no. I needed blood. Demon blood. I knew Sammyand I swore each other not to drink from the demons again and to quitbut Xavier happened to give me a little bottle of his blood. He wastalking to me, reaching deep down to convince me to continue drinkingand sadly, he achieved exactly that. When I finally closed the doorto the motel room, I took a deep breath. It was hard sneaking outlike that but I had done this for quite a while now and it seemed toget easier the more I did it. Shuddering because of the freezing coldwind, I made my way to the Impala. I sat down onto the floor, leaningagainst the black, shining car doors. Maybe, if I would just continuedrinking enough blood, I was able to kill Lillith by my own. I didn'tneed Sam to help me and protect him from the horrible conseqencesthis whole thing had. I wanted to save him from this and I wanted tobe strong enough to make sure the man that was like my brotherwouldn't get hurt. Dean accidently broke the first seal and all Iwanted was to make sure to save them from any worse. They had beenthrough enough. With a sigh, I pulled the silver bottle out of mypocket and took off the lid. Maybe this was wrong but at least Icould save the people I called my family. At least I could get achance on killing that bitch and save the two people I was spendinghalf of my life with. All of them needed to be saved and I knew itwas on me to do that. My hands started shaking when I put the bottleto my lips. I knew it was wrong and evil but it was the only chanceto save the world from the apocalypse and Lucifer. Little did I knowback then that I was doing it wrong. When the blood started to floatdown my throat, I moaned slightly. The taste of iron was on my tongueand I was shocked when I could taste a sweet scent. I never tastedthis before. It seemed like my need for the red liquid grew bigger bythe times I drank from the tiny bottle. I could feel how the bloodstarted to make me stronger, more powerful. As if I was about to killa hundred demons at the same time. ''What do you think are youdoing?!'' a very familiar voice asked in a rather angry voice, makingme flinch and nearly choke on the red liquid. I jumped to my feet,holding the open bottle behind my back when I felt a tiny drop ofblood running down the corner of my mouth. I wiped it away with theback of my hand and stared at the man in front of me. ''S-Sammy.W-What are y-you doing here?'' I stammered, trying to find an excuse.I thought for a second before I realised what he actually had done.''Wait...did you follow me?!'' I asked him, getting angry myself. Whywould he follow me? ''Oh don't call me like that, Alice. Of course Ifollowed you! Don't you think it's strange if my sister sneaks out ofthe room in the middle of the night? Don't you think I know thisattitude from somewhere?!'' he nearly screamed, stepping behind me.Too startled to react, I wasn't able to keep him from taking thesilver flask. ''Give it back!'' I shouted, walking up to him. I triedto get the bottle back, jumping up when the Winchester started tohold the blood up high. ''NO! You promised, Alice! We swore eachother not to do this anymore! How could you do that to me?! HOW?!''Sam screamed, putting his hand flat against my chest to keep me fromslapping his arm. I knew I hurt him but I had to get the demon juiceback, no matter the costs. What happened next, made my heart jump.The younger Winchester tipped the bottle and started to pour all theblood onto the ground. ''NO!'' I shouted, sinking to the ground. Theblood was all over the street and I kneeled into it, trying to catchevery drop of it. ''YOU IDIOT! WHY DID YOU DO THIS?!'' I screamed, myhands covered in demon blood that I was trying to save without anyluck. Suddenly, strong hands wrapped around my wrists and pulled meup. ''STOP! IT'S OVER!'' he yelled, his grip tighter than anyhandcuffs could ever be. ''Why did you do this?! Why?! We promisedeach other not to do it. How could you lie to me?! How long have youbeen doing this, huh?! How long?!'' he asked in an agry, upset voice.Tears started rolling down my cheeks. I knew I could fight againsthim with the fresh demon mojo floating through my veins but I didn'twant to. ''I asked you something!'' He shouted, trying to lock eyeswith me. ''Why did you do this?'' I asked over and over again, tearsstreaming down my face. It was over. There was no way I could killLillith now. There was no more blood, Xavier didn't answer my callsand Sam would have an eye on me from now on, that was for sure.''Answer me. How long?'' The Winchester asked in a firm, rather upsetvoice. ''I-I started a week after we gave each other the promise...''I whispered, wincing when his grip around my wrists got even tighter.''You helped me through this and pretended to suffer when all you didwas continuing drinking demon blood? Do you have any idea of the hellI went through?!'' Sam asked and I could hear how his voice startedshaking. He let go of my wrists, letting out a sacrastic snort. ''No.Of course you don't. You've been drinking demon juice. We swore wewouldn't do it! You promised!'' his voice got louder as his sentencecame to an end and I knew he was on the edge of crying. I wiped thetears from my cheeks and growled when he turned his back to me.''Don't you dare turn your back on me! Let me explain you why I didit!'' I begged, going after him as he started to walk away. He didn'tlisten and so I moved forward, grabbing his arm and spinning himaround. ''Leave me alone! I don't wanna hear your excuses! You knowwhat?! Screw you! I'll tell Dean you went off on your own. Don't youdare come back! Don't even think about it!'' he shouted, turningaround again. I stopped in my tracks, shocked by his words. He wantedme to leave? That couldn't be true. ''SAMUEL WINCHESTER! GET YOUR ASSBACK HERE!'' I screamed, tears starting to form in my eyes again.''You better be quick and get running because we will hunt you down!You are a monster, Alice and I will make sure to kill you myself. Ipromise you that!'' Sam shouted, disappearing around the corner, backinto his motel room. He didn't just leave, did he? Sam, the only onewho could really understand me left me alone in the freezing cold,dark night. I slipped down on one of the rough walls, looking at mybloody hands. I was a monster, Sammy was right. I messed up big timesand from one second to another, I lost my family. The only people wholoved and understood me for who I was. Well, not anymore. That wasfor sure.