The Monitor Masquerade

Boss 1

GraceKelli's POV

It was Saturday morning. Anya had come over to give us some banana bread her and her mom made the night before. We were all sitting in the living room when I finally just couldn't take it anymore.

"I'm canceling. I can't do this." I started to get up, but Anya pulled me back down. 

"Woah now. You've been wanting the date for like ten years! You are not about to back out right now are you?"

"Yes, yes I am."

"Honey calm down." My mom said with her coffee cup in her hand. "I'm sure you will have a great time. Taylor seems like a nice guy."

"THAT IS WEIRD!" I bursted. "Is no one else weirded out that we are talking about the Taylor I have been in love with for like the past two years so casually?"

"Kelli I think you have built him up in your head to be someone who is isn't. He's just a regular guy who finds you attractive." My mom sipped her coffee

"That's the weird part." Jason said looking up from his phone. "Someone finds her attractive while most men fear her gaming skills. Kelli don't worry this isn't the twilight zone."

"Then I have to be in the upside down." Panic threaten to enter my body when I thought about actually having to eat with Taylor.

"Come on Kelli. You got this! I believe in you!" Anya's phone buzzed. "And that is my cue to leave. I love you Kelli! You are going to do amazing! Just breath."

"Wait where are you going? You have to help me with make up."

"You are not the only one who has plans today."

"With who?!" Jason sat up.

"No one kid. I'm not going on a date, I'm just going with Andy to pick up some new die for DnD."

I fought the urge to cry as she got farther away from me. "Watch out for Andy. I hear he's a real ladies killer."

"I'm sure he is." She laughed and walked out the door.

"Can I call dad? Go get food with him? I'd rather do that."

"No Kelli. I think this will be good for you. You can over come a fear."

"I'm sick. I can't go."

"You are not sick Kelli." Jason rolled his eyes.

"Jason shut your mouth you just want my computer for the night."

"Am I that transparent?" Jason smiled.

"No games for either of you tonight unless Kelli goes."

"That's bullshit mom!"

"Kelli language!"

"No that is bullshit! I don't want to go on this date! I haven't slept in two days and have barley eaten anything this whole week because of this stupid fucking mental bullshit!" So it's going to be one of these attacks. "I have anxiety! I can't go! My stupid fucking mind is making me stay here! Don't you think I want to go?! Don't you think I want to not be scared for a single night in my life? Because I would love too but today is not that fucking day!"

My mom remained quiet and I could feel hot tears streaming down my face. "Kelli your anxiety does not define you. Is it a part of who you are, yes. But you shouldn't wear it around like it's the only thing you have in your closet. I know it is hard honey. I know. But you have to realize that you can still do things with it. That you can still go on dates and have fun with friends. Some times in life you're just going to have to do things shaking."