Hidden Close (Jr. Year)

Chapter 7

Part 7 Of The First Draft

It’s all my fault. She had taken that bottle of sleeping pills from my own personal collection. Lana may have made the decision to try and kill herself, but I unwittingly had provided her the means. I can't think about that now, though. I went through the halls of Knoxville Regional Hospital, and after a brief while, found her room.

“Lana! How are you doing?”

Lana was in some crumby, blue hospital clothes. She looked miserable, yet when she saw me, a glimmer appeared in her eyes.

“I’m....okay. The doctor said I can go home Friday, and I was able to call the school and made an arrangement to make up all the work I'm missing. I lost my job, though, but I promised your parents that I would do chores each day to make up for it. They seemed...well, happy when they visited. There’s something I need to tell you, though. Mindi?”

“Yes, Lana?”

“You saved my life. Thank you. I was depressed over my love life. Wesley tore my heart in two, and I don't want to date anyone at this point, I just want to focus on school.”

I smiled, and let out a sigh of relief.

“I’m glad, Lana. Your juggling act kinda set you up for this. I was worried...Lana, I love you. Please don't end up dead. Make me the promise that you will live.”

Lana looked down, as if she was taking in what I said. She then met my eyes, and took a serious look on her face.

“I promise you I won’t try to take my own life again. I want you to promise me that you won't die, either.”

I nodded my head, and told Lana, keeping my gaze on her eyes,

“I might hurt myself every now and then, but I'm not going anywhere, I promise you that.”

Lana seemed pleased, and admitted,

“I took your pills. I wasn't thinking when I did. I'm sorry, Mindi. It's my fault. You didn't tell your parents that they were your pills, did you?”

“No.....”

“Good. I won't tell them, either. Best that they don't know you still take pills, Mindi. Let me take the fall for you this time.”

I sounded off, and rejoiced,

“Thank you, Lana! I'm sorry that you have to lie for me....but it means everything to me.....”

I wiped away a tear, and smiled. One of the attendants came into Lana's room, and I realized it was time to go. I gave Lana a hug, and cleared out of the hospital wing. It was nice seeing Lana but this is a place I never want to be. They had kept Lana away from the normal psyche unit, as my parents had told the doctors about her situation. Her doctor had ruled that she had been too stressed, and she will return home after they stabilize her. I don't know if they'll make her take pills, but I know that my parents would never allow her to do that. My parents are the kind of people who believe that everything can be cured by love, as if they are the remains of the seventies. I couldn’t ask for better parents.

After I had arrived home, I went and found my mom.

“Mom....Lana is going to be okay. She thinks she will be coming home this weekend.”

My mom nodded her head, and then asked,

“Do you think she will be okay, though? Mindi, I know you are an expert about these sorts of things. Please, level with me.”

“Well...I believe she will be. I’m just sad that I can't be here much when she comes home. I have a date this weekend....Perry is taking me dancing, believe it or not.”

My mom seemed surprised, and remarked,

“Oh...I didn't know he liked dancing so much.”

I blushed, a tad embarrassed. I tried to explain to mom,

“Well...we both thought it would be fun. Sometimes, we dance in the Eisens' study.....and we thought we would go out and do it where they might have some rad music.”

My mom laughed, and then reminded me,

“Okay, dear, just remember to not be out too late. It'll worry your dad sick if you're not home by ten.”

“Of course, mom. I'll be home before then. I promise.”

My mom always trusts me, and sometimes I wonder why. We'll be going to a pretty dangerous place on Friday, and she doesn't even expect it. Perhaps it is more that she trusts Perry’s ability to protect me, and if that is the case, then she would be right. Perry may be overemotional, but I know he is one heck of a guardian. He always makes sure that I am close to him, and I can't help but say it makes me feel well loved. Perry has quickly fleshed out into the man of my dreams. He's what keeps me sane. During my sophomore year, I had became very lonely. What few kids I talked to were more like distractions to me. I never had friends, as I could never share my true thoughts and feelings with anyone. When he entered my life, I knew only of his skin deep beauty. When he opened up to me, he showed me his hidden world. It was dark and enchanting, and I willingly let it pull me under. His world is full of danger, and all I know is that for once in my life, I am alive. He has shown me what it is like to live, and I will repay him with my heart, body, and soul forever.

When I went to sleep that night, I let the whole world disappear around me. I thought of Perry, Becky, and Lana, wondering what each of them mean to me. Despite all of their flaws, I wouldn't mind having any of the three of them. Perry, though, is above them all. It is my dedication to him that keeps me from going elsewhere. That blind dedication to him is for good reason. He keeps my heart his because of how amazing he is. Lana and Becky are both beautiful but equally flawed. Perry, well, he seems perfect, and there is nothing more wonderful than the way he keeps me close to him, sharing his hot kisses and caring embraces with me constantly. I'll never get him out of my head and I know it.