Wandering Mind

Sleepless Nights

Lying awake at 00:20 isn't the best thing to be doing when you must be up for 6:30 am the next morning. And yet I'm sure to be awake for at least a few more hours, tossing and turning, lying on my side, lying on my front, lying on my back. I've tried every trick in the book, every trick you could think of, and still sleepless nights are all I look forward to in the wee hours.

My mother insists that it's because I've "mucked up your body clock, staying up 'till all hours and sleeping the day away!" - and I suppose in some respects she's right. Because come on, who doesn't enjoy sleeping in? My mother, that's who. Six o'clock on the dot, every morning, she'll be up without fail.

So okay, I'm not exactly a morning person... Actually there's no "exactly" about it. But really, to me, Night is so much more captivating than the dreaded Day could ever hope to be. Everything that you see during Day is still there when Night decends, and yet by the time the Sun has finished painting the otherwise pale and dull dome that resides above our head with a million vibrant colours as it falls beyond the horizon, the objects that were so clear to us during Day, obtain a certain mysterious and unknown quality during Night, that never ceases to leave me awe struck.

Problems that seems so sharp and defined during Day are diluted, if not erased with the decent of Night. Amazing, don't you think? Yet the Night is forbidden, or at least staying awake to... not view exactly because the Night isn't something you just see, it is an overwhelming presence that encompasses you - to appreciate its untamable beauty is somewhat considered taboo. Because Night isn't something you can trap. It is unpredictable. It is full of the unknown. And human kind does not like the unknown. But Night isn't something you can study under the harsh light of a laboratory. Because as wild and powerful as Night can be, Light destroys it.

However, how does the old saying go? There are exceptions to every rule, and in accordance with this saying, we have the Stars and the Moon. The Man on the Moon is a thief, unable to produce a Light as bright and exceptional as the Sun, it steals Light in hope that one day it might match its brilliance and eradicate Night. The Stars on the other hand, worship Night, for they could not exist without it. Their shine illuminates and increase Nights mystery, and for that the Night is thankfull, and allows them to dance across the sky in all their glory.

But of course the cycle of Day fading into Night and Night fading into Day is one that has lasted since the dawn of time, and shall continue on for many eons to come, no matter how much I wish it wouldn't. For one cannot have Night without a Day and Day without a Night.

1:38 am. Time is a strange thing. When my eyes are closed, struggling desperately to drift into unconsciousness, it feels as if each second is an age onto itself. And yet when my mind has finally decided to fall asleep, it seems as if it was only a second ago that I was awake, when in truth I'd slept the Night away.

I now feel my fingers slowing as I write these last few sentences and my eyes are getting heavier by the minute. Maybe now as I lay down my head and bid the Night goodbye I shall finally be at peace in my dreamless slumber...

Until my cursed alarm clock sounds at 6:30 tomorrow morning and then I must wait another Day before I might finally be able to once again greet the Night.

~JJ