SWEET NOTHINGS - S. LILLIS

"i miss you"

she didn't speak to me for two months. i saw her on gloomy days, hand in hand with the girl i longed to be. her blonde companion always looked too good to be true, even in the dimmest lights. when i saw them at the coffee shop at night, our coffee shop, it seemed as though, all at once, the entire ambiance of the room changed to that of summer, and my drink was suddenly very bitter. the two girls haunted me even on my best days.
self pity really is an ugly thing.
when she finally spoke to me, i was sitting on the steps of the school, waiting for a ride from my mother. she was running terribly late, and the air had become sharp with the chill of winter. i had even began to entertain the idea of walking home, though i knew i would for certain be late to work if i did so.
"do you need a ride?" of course i knew the sound of her voice. i had every part of her memorized like the back of my hand.
"no." she sighed. i still didn't look at her.
"oakley, it's cold." i didn't answer her. "now isn't the time to be stubborn. just let me take you, okay?"
"sophia, i really don't need your help." she sat down next to me, and i flinched.
"if you don't let me, i'm just going to sit here and wait with you so i know you got home safely." she had me there, and she knew it. i didn't even have to look at her to know there was a smirk on her lips. check mate.
"fine." we both got up from the steps, and i reluctantly followed her to her car. i knew i was acting like a petulant child, but i didn't care.
we didn't talk the whole way home. silence is overrated, i think. everybody raves about 'comfortable silence', but at a point it becomes too comfortable, like a sunken, worn in couch. some moments just aren't made to live in. when i arrived home, i gave the girl a curt nod before opening the door.
"oakley?" god, she really does look pretty in the winter. i've always thought so. i still do. "i miss you."
"you don't miss me sophia, you miss my company."
she didn't deny it. no words left her chapped, pink lips, though they were open- so i closed the door, and hopefully the gap between her lips, too.

-oakley