SWEET NOTHINGS - S. LILLIS

"you're my favorite person"

i called sophia as soon as i found out. we still weren't on good terms, but i felt like if anyone needed to know, it was her. she didn't say anything, she merely hung up. and the next thing i knew, she was at my door, hugging me so hard it hurt to breathe, and sobbing into my ear as i tried to console her. it was hard, to say the least. but it was enough to have her in my arms again.
"i love you, oakley. i'm sorry." i wasn't quite sure what she was apologizing for, but i hoped it was for the months i had spent without her. so i took it. i had given up the fight, i was too tired to be mad at her anymore. i really just wanted (needed) my friend back, even if it meant i had to be in love with her in silence. and so i was.
my days were once again filled with sophia, and platonic touches and sleepy blue eyes and booming laughter. it was nice, and i almost forgot about everything around me. sundays were ours again, and sophia turned people watching into a game of sorts, trying to set me up with girls she thought 'would compliment me'. whatever that means. i doubted anybody could measure up to her, but i never told her so. i simply let her carry on, because she seemed to enjoy it, and i couldn't let her see that i only had eyes for her.
"you're my favorite person," she said once, and i was startled, to say the least. my heart was beating so fast, and i felt like i could throw up. only sophia made me feel this way. "you deserve the best, okay?" she looked at me from her place on the bench, and her blue eyes were so honest it hurt. i just nodded.
"okay." she was the best. in every sense of the word, she was. and i think deep down i knew she deserved someone better than me, too.

-oakley