If I only could

Chapter 1

....If I could turn back time then I would re-write those lines.....

Danny O'Donoghue is well known as the vocalist of the famous pop-rock band in the world alongside with his bandmates, Glen Power and Mark Sheehan.

~~

He finished the last words of the song and look at everyone's faces around him with a smile on his face as he wait for their feedbacks.

"I guess that is the good one." Mark complement him with his another masterpiece.

Suddenly Glen hand him the tissue, he frowned with a question and that's when he only realize what's going on. He deeply sigh snatching the tissue in Glen's hand.

"You look emotional. And we know that." Glen stated. Then the room become silent

"How can you even smile with those tears rolling on your face?" Glen said and pat his shoulder trying to comfort him.

He made a promise that he won't be like this again! But then, he couldn't help being emotional just thinking about it.

"Let it out, you don't have to hide it. We understand how you feel. We all know how it feels." James, one of their writers said and pat his shoulder.

Suddenly he burst out crying, he can't control it and everyone in this room know how he truly feels.

It is really hard for him to write that song alone in the middle of the night while thinking how much pain it cost him and now he show it to them. He wasn't sure at first if they would like it, but he doesn't care about that, he just want to release all the pain in his chest, that's what matters to him.

He wiped his tears away while everyone's staring at him and feel sorry for him at the same time. If they can only take away the pain from him, they already did.

It's the song that can describe his situation at this moment. Situation that nobody want to feel.

"So, that's a good song. Let's count that in for your new album." Andrew one of their writers said.

"I agree. beside it has meaning each words are from the heart. So that's a perfect one for our new album." Mark agreed and he nod.

"Thank you, Guys. I'm sorry for being emotional." He apologize even there is nothing to do that so.

"No It's okay. It's not a crime to share what you feel inside. We actually want to applaud you for being brave." James once again, He smiled.

"It's late now. I guess we should continue this writing session by tomorrow." Andrew and stood from his chair and everyone agreed as they all get up from their seats too.

James and Andrew, two of their writers said their farewell for the meantime and head out of the studio to get home.

The three of them left. He let another sigh and went back on his seat.

"It's for her. Right?" Glen asked while getting his own stuff. He simply nod.

"It's not my intention to get emotional, But it's hard to control the emotions, you know?" He simply replied. Other people in the room nod theid heads.

"And especially when you have a lot of questions in your head. Isn't it?" Mark continued what he wants to say. He nod.

"It's okay. Like what we said, we know how you feel. I cannot blame you for that, We cannot judge you unless we're in your shoes. That is the hardest one, I don't know what will happen to me If I were you." Glen said and sat on the chair.

"Dan, it's okay. That's what you feel, It's fine to let it out. If my wife left me the same with no reason? I swear, I'll be the same as you.. I might be crazy finding an answer to the question of 'Why did she left without words?' , So It's okay to act like that." Mark said and he smile a little bit.

"Thanks for your understanding. By the way, I must go home." He said and both of his mates just simply nod as an answer.

He grabbed his backpack and pat them on their shoulder and he headed out of the studio with a deep thoughts.

-

As he get home he expected to see his sister, Vicky at the living room. He greeted her and walk straight to the kitchen to get himself a glass of water.

"Did you have dinner?" Vicky asked.

"Yes. I had dinner with the lads." He said and she nod, she get back her attention on T.V watching dramas.

"I'll go to my room." He said and he didn't even bother to wait for her to respond, He walk up the stairs straight to his room.

He silently close the door behind him while staring at the little tiny girl who's sleeping on the crib. He smile for a reason... A reason to keep on holding on.

He quickly get changed on his pajamas and sat on his bed, he turned on the lamplight and stare at the little girl sleeping like an angel.

He held her tiny hand and his eyes got wet.

He's a father of a little 6 months old baby girl. His wife? He has no idea if what their status now.

He tried everything he can to contact her but there are no words, All he knew that she is in America for work but it's been two months now, She didn't answer any of his calls nor reply to his messages for 2 months now, He has no Idea if what had happened between him and his wife. 3 months ago before she left, she promised to come back home in 3 months, but it's been 3 months now and 2 months of no connection from her.

The last time he had conversation with her was when they were talking about their daughter.

And after that, he never heard anything from her. What's worst he had no idea what's her reason to do that.

Despite of everything, He's trying to think positive as much as possible and keep on believing that she'll come back home for him and for their daughter. He'll be okay in any excuses she has if she come back. Those excuses doesn't matter, He needs her, They need her.

He carry his daughter in his arms and he lie down on the bed. Having his daughter too close to him reminded him of his wife, the smell that this little girl had reminds him a lot about her.

He couldn't deny that he miss her too much, but what else could he do?

But then without her, It wouldn't be the same. He feels incomplete, the room feels empty.

A loving wife, who always cook with love before he even woke up, who will shower him with lot of kisses just to wake him up each day in the morning. A loving mother who will do everything to protect their daughter. He miss her, but how long should he wait for that memories to happen once again?

-

He woke up at the middle of the night with his daughter in his arms crying for milk.

He carefully get up and put his daughter down next to him and make a bottle of milk.

He used to do this and it's not an easy things to do. It's one of the hardest but the best he experienced in his life, waking up at the middle of the night to make a bottle of milk for an infant.

His daughter fell back in a deep sleep while he silently singing a lullaby for her.

He could remember not that long ago waking up in the middle of the night seeing his wife carrying their daughter in her arms as she feeds her while singing lullabies but now, he's doing it.

He wants to hate her for a reason, but he loves her too much to hate her.

-

In the next morning he woke up but his daughter is not next to him. He panic a little bit when he saw no shadow of her.

He jumped off his bed, she might be with vicky playing down the stairs.

As he get downstairs , he didn't saw his sister there but she saw someone instead with his daughter in her arms...

"Jess?" .......