Masquerade, A Tom Hiddleston Story

Part 7 "Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind"

"Tom.."

She pulled away for a minute, her green eyes staring deeply into mine. She gave the sweetest smile. I stole a quick chaste kiss. She twirled one of my curls with her fingers. I pulled her close again for a long deep kiss. I lost count of how many kisses we shared tonight. But each one feels different than the last.

Soon we were fogging up the car.

"I feel bad...for your driver" she gestured to the driver waiting patiently by the car. Cigarette in hand.

"He's fine..." I assured her. "Probably should get his lungs and heart checked now and again, but he's fine..."

She let out a giggle and placed a hand on my cheeks.

"How is it that you are so... YOU" she asked as her other hand made her way down to my waist.

"Im afraid I don't follow..." I ran my fingers through her platinum hair.

"You're smart, charming and funny... " Her hand caressing my back gently now. It's amazing I'm still able to form coherent sentences with her being so close, saying the things she is saying.

"And how is it that you are YOU?" I replied. Stealing another quick kiss.

"How drunk are you?" She quizzed?

"Sober now. I get high really fast but it never last...I guess I have good self control... In that department" I told her truthfully but my tone was heavily laced with innuendo. I nuzzled her neck and pulled her even closer. I can feel self control leaving me, starting with my hands. She welcomed my advances at first. But then she stopped.

"Listen Tom..." She said pulling slightly away.

"I think we should take it slow." She whispered.

I obligingly pulled away and cleared my throat.

"I'm sorry... Im coming on a bit strong"  I admitted.

She sighed and smiled.

"I am not very good at this... The whole romance thing..." She said bashfully. Her eyes avoiding mine.

"And you being you is not helping" she added.

"Kate I still don't follow..."

She straigthened up which triggered me to do the same. It was now physically painful not to have her in my arms.

"Tom... We are in a foreign country just finishing up a taxing, tiring and mind consuming project. We are both tired shitless.." she started.

"You had too much to drink..."

"No wait stop, I'm not drunk I swear..." I complained.

"Just listen please... " She pleaded.

"I think we are not in the best place mentally and physically to start something..." She went on.

"Maybe we should not..."

"Okay stop..." I interupted adamantly.

"I am falling for you Kate. Hard... I fell for you from the first time we ever spoke to each other. And I can tell you like me too. You might think that this is circumstantial or passing lust or what have you... But I'm telling you what I feel. And I feel this is too real to ignore... Don't deny that we connect on another level"

"I can't be with someone like you" she blurted.

My heart sank. My face fell. Her words like daggers slicing the air.

She bit her lip and cupped my face.

"Im sorry that didn't come out right... As always my mouth can't keep up with my brain. I think you are smart and funny and driven... Charming and lovely... I just want to be kissed by you. And that's why this thing will never work out. I can't date Tom Hiddleston"

There was an uncomfortable silence for once.

To tell you the truth I still don't follow. Being the daft prick that I am. So she thinks I'm great but she doesn't want to be with me? I feel somewhat offended.

"Kate... What do you wanna do?" I asked calmly.

"Let's go back to London and see how things go" she smiled again. Relieve written all over her face at my understanding.

"I can't start something like this. With you being Tom Hiddleston, actor, charmer, funniest man I know... I need to see things clearly and rationally. I don't leap off the cliff Tom. I need a heavy duty climbing rope and safety helmet and gloves".

I nodded. I understand better now. It's truly amazing that a part of me hates her for not realizing the strong bond we have, but another part of me just simply gets it. This is why I fancied her in the first place. For that self knowing quality that she proudly wears on her sleeve.

"I understand... But Kate you have to know this. I am Tom Hiddleston. No matter where I am, this is me. What you see is what you get."

She kissed me deeply. As if the last 10 minutes of conversation never happened.

And then she pulled away.

"And don't change... Not for me. I have to go" She caressed my cheeks softly.

I sighed deeply and kissed her again. This time making sure that she will never forget the feel of my lips on hers.

"Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind."

She giggled as she got out of the car.

"Maybe dial down on the charm next time..."