Just A Taste

Chapter 17

Grief. What is grief? I've learned that it's really just love. It's all the love you want to give, but cannot. All the unspent love gathers up in the corner of your eyes, the lump of your throat and in the hollow part of your chest. Grief - is just love with no place to go or hide.

xxx

"Rosella." I heard him calling me. I didn't stop, as I didn't want to face him anymore. I kept on walking but was suddenly pushed against the wall. I kept my face straight and didn't look at him.

"Look at me Ella." he said

I felt like punching him, but controlled my anger and didn't do what he said. He grabbed my arm tightly and made me face him. Anger. That's all I saw.

"Stay away from that new kid!" he said.

That did it and I slapped him. "Don't tell me what to do or not do. You are nothing to me anymore, Xavier. So stop thinking that you can control my life like you used too. Stop thinking that you mean something to me because in all honesty you don't."

Xavier gritted his teeth and was ready to punch me but as soon as his fist flew near my face it was caught by no other Aegon. He twisted his arm behind his back and spoke up. "Did your parents not teach you any manners?"

Xavier looked back and pulled his arm out of Aegon's grip and gave me one last glance and left.

Aegon looked at me. "Are you okay?"

I sadly smiled and nodded.

"Do you want to talk?" he asked, all of the sudden. I was shocked as to hear him ask this question. I shook my head. "Nah, I don't want to both-"

"Stop. Don't think you're a burden on me. Trust me you can share with me if you want." He said and warmly smiled.

My heart started to beat faster. I just stood there staring at him for a while but then nodded. "Let's go to an empty class and talk."

He smirked. "Kinky." He said and winked.

"Oh. Hush." I said and covered my face with my hair. Aegon chuckled and wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

...

Aegon's P.O.V:

"I don't know where to start from." she said and sighed. She looked down at her hands, I was about to speak but she started to talk and I stopped.

"When we first met and got to know each other, I thought he was my everything. The guy of my dreams - the guy I always wanted. He was my everything. My love and my world. He was the moon to my dark nights and my happiness when I used to suffer from depression. And now I just remember feeling like I want to take everything back from him - my touche, kisses, my love, emotions, my loyalty, time, energy, conversations, compromises, efforts and - myself."

"You speak so highly of him." She looked at me but didn't say anything back. "Why do you do that? Why do you speak of him as if he put the stars in the sky when he did nothing but break you so damn much that the cracks in your heart are practically visible through your eyes."

She laughed, "that's the thing about love, isn't it? You'll let them get away with murder, even if it's your own."

My heart broke at hearing answer. I stayed quiet as I had nothing to say back to her.

"Strange isn't it?" She asked

I frowned. "What is?"

"How you can be desperately in love with someone even when you haven't spoken to them for months. I think it's incredible how, despite the distance between two people, you'll never stop loving them. That's just how love works I suppose - you either love them forever or you never loved them to begin with. Love doesn't leave just because the person does." She looked at me and sadly smiled. "After he broke my heart, I began writing about him. I wrote and I wrote. I've described him as a hurricane, a drug, my universe. Now that I think I have moved on, I don't see him in that way anymore. He wasn't anything above ordinary, he was just a boy. A boy who didn't want to be with me and that's that."