BF: Bl()w Job mo ako Hon..
GF: Di ako marunong Hon..
BF: Madali lang, para ka lang nag sisigarilyo. Hithitin mo.
GF: Ganun!? Palalabasin ko din ba sa ilong?
* * * * *
Boy: Chicharon ka ba?
Girl: Bakit?
Boy: Ang ingay mo kasi pag kinakain kita =D
* * * * *
Son sees his Mom licking his father’s b@11s
Son : Ano gawa mo mommy?
MOM : Kain lang mommy ng bola bola
Son: Takaw naman ni mommy. may bola bola na may lumpia pa!!!
* * * * *
Boy: BLACKBERRY kaba??
Girl: Bakit?
Boy: Kasi, ang ganda ng CURVE mo, lalo na siguro kung B()LD ka…
Madre: ano apelyido mo iho?
Sakristan: Alam nyo na po yun sister! lagi nyo po yun hinahawakan..
Madre: Susme! B@Y@G apelyido mo?
Sakristan: Sister naman… ROSARIO po
* * * * *
After having sex, panay pa rin hawak ng girl sa organ ng lalaki..
BOY: Gusto mo pa ulit ?
GIRL: Hinde… Namimiss ko lang.. Meron kasi ako nito dati ehh…
* * * * *
Boy: Sana BOLA ka na lang…
Girl: Bakit???
Boy: Ang sarap mo pag-agawan tapos tirahin…
* * * * *
Miss baril ka ba ?
P@T1RA naman. Kahit isang PUT()K lang ?
* * * * *
Boy: Miss magic lamp ka ba?
Girl: Bakit?
Boy: Sige nga, P@HIM@S ?
* * * * *
Boy: Miss steady ka ba?
Girl: Bakit?
Boy: Gusto kita galawin e.
* * * * *
DALAWANG LASING ANG SABAY UMIHI.
Lasing 1 : Pare, sobra ang tigas ng T1T1 ko, Uuwi na ako at yayariin ko muna
si Misis.
Lasing 2 : Sasama ako sa iyo.
Lasing 1 : Baket?
Lasing 2 : E, sa akin ang yang hawak mong T1T1 eh !!!!
* * * * *
Boy: Miss lamesa ka ba?
Girl: Hinde. Bakit?
Boy: Gusto kasi kitang PATUNGAN e.
* * * * *
Boy: Sana naging palay ka nalang.
Girl: Bakit?
Boy: Para pwede kitang BAYUHIN.
* * * * *
Sana naging manok ka na lang,
Para lagi mong inuupuan ITL()G ko.
It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.
-Marilyn Monroe
I don't know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.
-Woody Allen
Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power.
-Oscar Wilde
We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.
-Tom Robbins
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
-George Carlin
If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
-Frank Zappa
Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
-Mae West
We are all born sexual creatures,thank God, but it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.
-Marilyn Monroe
The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.
-Woody Allen
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
-George Carlin
In a perfect world, you could fuck people without giving them a piece of your heart. And every glittering kiss and every touch of flesh is another shard of heart you’ll never see again.
-Neil Gaiman,
A/N: Check out my stories. Thanks!!!
BINABASA MO ANG
101 Heart Failures
RandomA collection of Quotes/Hugot/Banat/Patama/Pick up lines and Sayings.
