Sometimes it's a little too much...|| Emilio Martinez

Chapter 10

Emilio POV

Ivan handled this way than I thought. This was a pretty bad panic attack , even from him. My mind is all over the place. This was just too much to handle at once. Mum and dad can't know about this , any of this. Thankfully my weight and cutting problem won't be told. I lied to the doctor that my parents already knew about it. I should go to sleep but I just can't. I need to speak with someone. Maybe Tessa can help me. I took my phone from the table next to my bed. Tessa's number popped up instantly in my contact. I'm not even sure if she will pick up the phone. I have no idea what's the time in LA. After a while she finally picked up. "Hello" "Hey Tessa ! Sorry did I wake you up ?" "No, it's fine. How are you holding up Emilio ?" "I'm pretty good !" "Ivan told us you're in the hospital." "He did ?" "Yeah ! He was hysterical in the phone. We couldn't fully understand much." "Don't worry nothing serious, I'm good now !" "That's amazing ! I'm glad !" "This isn't why I called you." "Why did you call me than Emilio ?" "Ivan told me everything. Why the others bullying me." "Ohh Emi ! I'm sorry !" "It's fine. It's a lot to handle right now, but I'll be fine." "It was hard to handle for me too at first..." "I should get going." "Me too." "Bye Tessa !" "Bye Emilio !"- I put my phone back on the table. I made myself comfortable in the bed. Ivan is out cold next to me on his bed. The nurses brought him into my room. The doctor told me that would be the best for him if he is next to his brother. I closed my eyes letting the darkness to take over me.
-------------------In the morning---------------
Ivan POV

Very bright light made me open up my eyes. It felt like my eyelids are made out of heavy rocks. Slowly opened my eyes , I was welcomed with the sun. I can't remember what happened. How did I end up in a hospital bed ? Everything came rushing back. My panic attack , and the things I told to Emilio.. EMILIO !! Shit , shit !! Where is he ? I looked around in the room. I hear the toilet flushing. So this must be my roommate. When the door opened , Emilio stepped out of the bathroom. A flash of relieve goes over me. "Morning Ivan ! How you doing ?" "Morning Emi ! I'm good !" "That's great ! You scared me !" "Sorry !" "It's OK. Too much information at a time."-yes the information... The fact that I'm responsible for the scars on my brother is going to hunt me for the rest of my life. I know it isn't just my fault only, but I should have been there for him. "Emilio ?" "Yes Ivan ?" "Can we talk about...you know..." "About my cuts ?" "Yes ! Only if you want to."-his eyes showed lot of emotions at a time. One thing stood out for me. Sparkles. Those sparkles that I saw a very long time ago. "Of course ! You have the right to know about it." "Thank you for trusting in me ! I know , I don't worth it but still..." "What do you want to know ? You can ask anything !" "Hmmm.... When was the first time you cut ?" "More than a month ago. It wasn't on purpose actually. I was just thinking about the possibilities, when it happened. Let's just say my shaving went a little bloodier than I imagined." "So you didn't do it on purpose ?" "Well... I was concerning cutting but I never had the guts to do it." "Did it worth it ?" "Worth what ?" "The pain. Did it worth it ?" "You want me to say the truth or you want me to say what would be the best answer for you ?" "Truth please." "It did worth it. All the pain worth it." - I never expected this from my brother. Never in a million years I thought my brother would say this. "Anything else you want to know about ?" "Nothing comes to my mind now. I'm just sorry ! Sorry for all the scars I did to you !" "They'll heal someday." "The wound may heal but the scars will be there for the rest of your life !" "Ivan please ! Don't blame yourself for all of this ! This isn't just your fault !" "I know but I could've stop them or defend you !" "You didn't do it ! Please Ivan , forget about it ! Let's focus on the future." "Yeah you're right !" - a minute later a nurse brought us breakfast. Now that I know about Emi's problem I'll make sure to help him to recover. I had to force down a few pieces of apple on his throat. I know it will be hard , but together we'll make it.
Our parents came in around noon. Mum nearly got a heart attack when the doctor told her what happened. The doctor said I. can go home in the afternoon. Tonight I can't stay with Emilio but I wish I could ! I want to spend every possible time with him. Tomorrow I won't leave him alone for even a minute. That won't happen. Never again...