My Hope

다섯

[You have one voicemail]

[Hey Y/n, I miss you so much. I'm so lucky I get to know you, and love you. I'm very sorry for being killed. Please don't follow me on the afterlife or I'll beat you ass.]

*lob dub* *lob dub*

The sound of her heartbeat. She chuckled.

*drip* *drip*

She sobbed.

As she continued to cut her wrist.

The room was silent, the water has stopped dripping, only her heartbeat and breathing we're heard around the room.

She closed her eyes as she let all the tears fall on her cheeks, she cried the tears that had left.

She snorted.

"I didn't know, I have tears left. After all these years of crying myself to sleep, even when I'm eating in my dining room alone, taking a bath, walking to the Han river. I've been crying so much. And no one ever noticed me." She muttered under her breath as she cut herself.

Abruptly her phone rung outside the washroom. She quickly run to her phone. might be hobi again...

She answered her phone.

[Hey honey. How have you been?]

[Honey? Are you there?]

[Are you doing fine?]

[You called. I'm happy you called. Mom... Do you ever tell Hoseok about my condition?]

[You didn't tell him you have cancer?]

[No. And I regret it. I wish I have told him before. Maybe we spent more time together.]

[Hey, don't blame yourself, it happened for a reason.]

[Yeah right. [

[Mom. Can I ask you something?]

[Go on, I'm listening.]

[You said, not too long ago, that everything has a reason.]

[Yeah?]

[What do you mean by that? do you happened to know what reason why Hoseok died?]

[No response]

[Mom. I need answers.]

[Still no response]

[Okay, if you're not going to tell me. Please just listen to me.]

[I loved Hoseok. And i still can't get over with him. Mom, he was my hope, my sunshine. I didn't expect he would be gone too early.]

[Mom. I love Hoseok. I love him very much. I never wanted him to die.]

[Promises are meant to be broken right? I made a promise to Hoseok that I'll keep smiling, I'll stay alive and live my life to the fullest.]

[I may not be able to promise that anymore. Mom. He was my sunshine and my hope to everything.]

[And now that he's gone. I don't think I can keep that promise to myself. It's much mom. I can't take away the pain. It's too much for me to bear every night and day, that I never see his happy face, hear his angelic voice, or even touch him. I can't take it.]

[I think it's time mom. I love you...]

[End call]

Everything's felt so surreal. I can now be finally free. I will soon see Hoseok again. I can smile again. I can be with him again. I never want to wake up in this dream. It's a dream come true.

I want to see Hoseok.

My hope.

---

Blood dripping down the floor as she cut herself more. Her bathtub was now full of water. It's no longer dripping.

She can finally rest in peace.

She walked towards the tub, lifting her foot and the other. Her feet touching the cold water.

It feels do good.

This is what I've always wanted, from the start. Before I met Hoseok.

He saved me, he gave me hope, he was my everything.

But now... he's gone... everything shattered into pieces.

"I'm sorry to the people I hurt while I was hurting."

I put the note in top of the sink, as I put myself in the cold water. I shivered as I did my whole body in the tub. I smiled once more. I'm coming for you hobi. Her memories with Hoseok flashed as she shivered to the coldness of the water.

Mianhae...

---

She later there, her fingers went well, her breathing fastened, tears streaming down her cheeks, the blood already stained the water. She closed her eyes. Letting her head sink in the blood-stained water...

The pain of struggling. I can feel it. I tried to breathe, but only water came clogging my air way.

She states in the water... until she just stopped.

---

Until... someone pulled her up the tub...