My Hope

일곱

Pulling her out of the water feels like I've been hurt too.

She just sat there for an hour, shivering. I gave her a towel but she insisted.

I pity her.

She kept her eyes close.

I don't want to add anything...

I don't want to hurt her feelings...

I've done the thing she never wanted...

To live in this world again...

Mianhae...

---
"Eomma." She muttered. I quickly turned to face her. Her eyes were bloodshot. Her lips are chapped and almost blue. Her voice shivered.

"Hoseok called." She muttered under those shivering voice.

"What do you mean?" I asked. Staring at her thin and fragile figure. It makes me want to cry. I didn't even notice she was already breaking into pieces.

"He called. And he told me that he loves me. He misses me, he called me." Tears started to form in my eyes as I felt more pity. She looks pitiful, I stared at her hopeful eyes.

"Really? What did he say in your dream?" I asked, trying to comfort her.

"It's not a dream Eomma." She asserted. What does she mean?

"Of course, it's a dream honey. Hoseok's dead--"

"He called me! Okay! He said that he loves me! He misses me! He wanted me to keep smiling for him! He even told me he was just right beside me! He loves me Eomma!" I couldn't hold it anymore, but to burst out crying. Why would she think Hoseok texted her?

"Honey. You need to wake up. Hoseok's dead." I tried to convince her. But she shook her head.

"Just. Leave. Leave me alone!" She spat. Her eyebrows were furrowed.

"But-" I tried to connect with her but she pushed me away.

"I want to be alone! You don't believe me anyways!" She shouted. As I leave the room.

I quickly dialed Jin to come over and talk to Y/n.

---

After a few minutes Jin finally came.

"Take care of her for me. She needs someone who can understand her situation." I said leaving him the key.

---
(Jin's P.O.V)

Once I entered the room. The atmosphere went dark. I can feel the sadness and grief.

I walk towards the light, which was in the bathroom.

I walk towards the light to see Y/n on the floor curled up. As her back leaned against the cold wall. I walk forward, and sat beside her.

"Y/n~" I muttered. Leaning on the wall beside her. We stayed in that position for half an hour.

"What are you doing here?" She finally spoke up. She straightened her position, her knees were folded in front of her, her arms tangled around her knees.

"Hoseok would do the same too." I said. She looked towards me.

"Would you believe me if I tell you that Hoseok called me?" She asked with hopeful eyed.

"What did he tell you?" I asked trying to control the situation.

"He told me. He misses me, he loves me." My heart broke. Does she really thought a dead person can call her? I smiled.

She frowned. "You don't believe me either." She said. A tear fell from her eyes.

"Uh. I do believe you." I said.

"You are just telling me that, to make me feel good. It's okay if you won't believe me. Everyone doesn't believe me at all. They think I'm crazy, weak, pathetic, weirdo, and they all wished that I die. There's no place for me in this world. It's too big for a small weird girl to live in this world. I'm too weak to handle all the pain and struggles. Can you please kill me?" She said. A tear fell from my eyes. She was really that desperate to die. Now I know why.

"Do you want to know what Hoseok tell me every time we chat?"

"What?"

"He always told me how he loves you very much. How he misses you every time you are not together. How he wants to be with you all day. He always tells the group that sane thing."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He said you were amazing. He told me you are his sunshine. That every time you smile, his world brightens. He Also told me. That if left, we should take care of you. That we should love you like he did. He told me... that he wishes that you live longer and continue your life, even if he wasn't part of it anymore. Y/n, Hoseok loves you so much."

"He really said that?"

"Yeah. And I hope you feel better now "

"I do now. Knowing he really loves me. For who I am." She smiled.

But I don't know if it was real, or just to satisfy me.

I want her to smile again.

She was fine when everything's alright.

But is she really fine now? Even Hoseok isn't here to make her happy?

Is it enough?

Play the video while reading it after reading. :) :(