Randomness of the Queen: Zweiter Teil

#&@$%

As most of y'all know by now, I'm a mom. Yep. And most of the time I'm far from winning any Mother of the Year awards. However, the damn shit I went thru tonight better win me something.

There always comes a time in a child's school years when a science teacher wants a project done. I'm not talking about Science Fair shit either. Just a project of some sorts. Well, that came for my daughter in the form of a 3D cell model. It could either be an animal cell or a plant cell and either edible or non-edible. My daughter chose an edible plant cell. Easy enough, right?

Hell fucking no! After googling what we could use to make it, I was pretty confidant we'd pull it off with no problem. How very fucking wrong I was. 😱 After buying all the items we needed, we started on it when I got home from work today. First attempt, using jello as the cytoplasm and fruit rollups as the cell membrane (which lined the dish), was a huge disaster. The fruit rollups started to melt before the dish was put in the fridge. (The jello was supposed to firm slightly for an hour, then we'd shove all the stuff for the parts into it, then it'd completely firm overnight.) 😑 So, I poured the jello out, re-lined the dish, and tried again. It seemed like it was gonna work...until the hour was up and the damn fruit rollups had just about dissolved. 😠

What the fuck was I gonna do now?! Panic, of course. This damn thing is due tomorrow, it was 30 min from my daughter's bedtime, and I had no more jello mix. Yep, I had an anxiety attack. Then I remembered that I saw something about making a cake as the cytoplasm. Lucky for my daughter I just happened to have a yellow cake mix in the pantry. Well, whadya know...it wound up working perfectly. Of course my daughter had to go to bed after the cake went in the oven so putting the whole thing together once it came outta the oven was my job. Geezus. The only thing I have left to do is stick the little toothpick flags in each part for the labeling which she made while I was at work today.

So, below you'll see a pic of a plant cell that I found online which served as the inspiration for her model and a pic of the finished model she'll take to school tomorrow. Btw, some parts from the online pic are missing from her model because they were only required to label twelve parts.

I swear to bob if she doesn't get an A, I'm gonna lose my shit!