"People come back?" Jack asked hopefully, sitting in the backseat with me.
"Sometimes. They're called ghosts, and if they can't pass onto Heaven or Hell, they stay here until they complete whatever unfinished business they had to do. Other times, people make deals with demons or use magic spells to come back. But.. What stays dead needs to stay dead. That's just kinda how it's supposed to work." I explained, leaning my head against the window of the car.
Dean shot me a look through the rear view mirror. I rolled my eyes and turned to look at Jack.
He was looking at the FBI agent cards we had. "These are you guys?"
"Sometimes." Sam replied, looking uncomfortable.
"I thought lying was bad." The nephilim tilted his head like Cas would.
I giggled slightly. He was way too cute. "It is, but sometimes it's necessary. In this line of work, you have to lie."
"Let's go." Dean said, exiting Baby.
~~~
"Where is he?" I asked Dean as I walked up to him. Sam was behind me, dressed in his FBI suit. I wore a business casual dress.
"He's getting food." Dean jerked his head in the direction Jack was.
"I told you to watch him!" Sam hissed, exasperated.
"I can see him!" Dean said in defense.
I rolled my eyes. Dean sure was getting on my nerves as of late. Couldn't he realize we were all grieving?
Jack stepped up next to me, holding a trey of cups and some hotdogs. Dean grabbed a hot dog and began to stuff his face.
"Thanks, Jack." I smiled, taking mine and eating it like a person with manners.
"What did you find out?" Dean asked around a mouthful of food to his brother.
Sam explained what we had discovered. The victims had written in journals, talking about their sessions in grief counseling and catharsis.
"Grief counseling?" Dean questioned with a raised eyebrow.
"Let's get going." I sighed, already knowing where this was going.
~~~
"I need to see him again." I told Mia, the shapeshifter. Both of the boys were gone, off to work on the case. Jack had had his turn at seeing Kelly, and now it was my turn.
"Your father?" She raised an eyebrow, a soft smile on her face.
"He's.... He was horrible. He was mean. Cruel. But I loved him still and he didn't deserve to go out the way he did. I need to see him one more time... Real or not." I explained, tears forming in my eyes.
I showed her the only picture of my dad I had on my phone. She nodded her head and stepped away.
"Clothes your eyes." She told me. I did as she said, sitting in the couch and closing my eyes. This was stupid, I knew it was, but I couldn't help it. My humanity begged to see Crowley once more, to say goodbye.
"Hello, darling." The accented voiced of my father spoke. My eyes flew open and tears began to drop down my cheeks.
"Daddy...?" I choked. I flew up from my spot and hugged him, even though, deep down, I knew it was Mia.
"I'm here." He whispered, wrapping his arms around me.
"Why did you do that? Why did you sacrifice yourself?! It was all for nothing!" I sobbed, beating my fists against his chest.
His grip on me tightened. "You're still here. That's what matters. I did this for you."
"No you didn't! You gave up! You just... you gave up! You wouldn't let me give up but yet you did!" I gripped the collar of his suit, burying my face in his chest.
"I didn't give up, love. I gave my life up, so you and the boys could escape. You would have done the same, and you know it." His hand rubbed up and down my back. This was the closest to a father daughter moment we had ever had. And it wasn't even real.
I pulled myself away and wiped away my tears. I took in a deep breath and calmed myself down. "Thank you, Mia. I needed that." I gave a little bow and left the room, only to be met with a crowbar to the face.
~~~
I woke up with a pounding headache. My wrists were handcuffed to a bar in the room, along with Jack and Dean. Sam was still nowhere to be seen.
The shapeshifter we were after, Buddy, was angrily talking to Mia. A pile of shed skin and blood was on the floor by Dean.
"Sam is coming up here, you need to use your powers!" Dean told Jack in a low voice. His urgency showed in his tone, and I wished I had been awake to know what the fuck was going on.
"I.... don't know if I can." Jack confessed.
"You have to." I croaked. My throat ached from all the crying I had done.
"Sam believes in you. Lapis believes in you. You've got this." Dean told him, encouraging him.
Just then, the door opened and Sam burst in. Buddy fired off a shot from his gun, and Jack's eyes began to glow gold.
"No!!" He screamed, shooting off a blast of energy at the shifter. The bullet missed Sam and the man flew into the wall.
Sam entered the room, looking confused and slightly afraid. He shot Buddy in the head, killing him.
"You did it, Jack." I smiled, leaning my head against his shoulder and trying to calm down my sick stomach. Everything hurt right now.
"I did it..." he breathed.
~~~
I rested on my bed, healing from the hunt. I couldn't help but think about my father. He really was a terrible piece of shit, but I still missed him. After all, he did kill himself to save us.
Maybe... Maybe he's at peace? I mean... Demons ended up in Purgatory, right? Or was he somewhere else? Was it too much of me to hope he was actually somewhere that wasn't an awful place?
"I miss you... you stupid bastard." I muttered as I snuggled down in my sheets, feeling tears well up in my eyes. Maybe he deserved to be in Purgatory or somewhere else, fighting for his life. He surely didn't deserve my tears.
"No more crying, Lapis. He doesn't deserve it." I hissed to myself, furiously wiping away the tears. I'd rub my eyes and cheeks raw if need be. I refused to waste any more energy on the man that didn't deserve it. My energy needed to be spent on hunts or helping Jack.
It just goes to show that regardless of abuse or terrible bullshit, your parents still had an immense affect on you. John did on Dean and Sam. Lucifer did on Jack. And Crowley sure as hell had one on me.
Not anymore. As of this moment, he wouldn't have a hold on me any longer. His body was burned and he wasn't ever coming back. And that was how it needed to be.
YOU ARE READING
Devil In Me (Jack Kline/Supernatural)
Fanfiction"I don't want to wake it up; the devil in me." In which a friend of the Winchesters helps the youngest one teach Lucifer's son what it's like to be loved.