The Daily Life Of Colee Magy II

The First Official Chappie

"I had three dreams about them this week..." I replied, monotonously. My face was devoid of any emotion. My life was just this cycle... A never ending cycle of living a life I didn't really want to live. I had two therapists and I was on a plethora of pills and medications to help me regain my sanity after being in the coma.

"Well, that's an improvement, surely." My therapist remarked with a slight smile, jotting something down on her clipboard. We talked for a while, as we did every week. I left, not feeling any different, as usual. Everything was just a never-ending torrent of depression. In the car ride home, to a new house that I lived in, I thought about why I was so down... The truth was... I missed the world I had resided in during the duration of my coma. It was fun and fantastical. I loved it there, but everyone has to wake up from their dreams at some point, right? Why do I keep having dreams about them, then? Why do they keep asking me for help? Who am I talking about, you may wonder. I'm talking about the people I met when I was in a coma.

Then it dawned on me. I needed to get back. I can't believe I had never thought to put myself in a coma again. The last time the event happened because I had a pretty bad fall while riding. Maybe this time, if I hit myself on the head with something, it would work!

When my mother parked the car in our driveway, I quickly jumped out and began beating myself on the head with a pink, metal baseball bat we had laying around in the backyard. After a couple of hits, I passed out, luckily just before my mother could reach me.

~🍆~🍆~

I woke up. In my bed! My bed! Haha! I was about to run downstairs, but I stopped and slid down the railing, chortling all the way.

"Mama Onion!" I screeched, when I saw her. I hugged the woman that reeked of onions, and she inquired, "Do you want your butt-shaped mango? I know it's been quite some time, and I'm sure..." I thought for a moment, reminding myself that mangoes
contained the itching sauce, but I didn't really give a flying fa-tart-a-doodle-doo about that shit! I smacked my thigh, "You betcha, bitch!" I said, grinning from ear to ear. The butt-shaped mango tasted like a dream. Eating ass was WAY better than I remembered. It was especially better in this universe – a lot more tastier. Not that I would know or anything...

I couldn't believe I was here... I was Colee... and not... That other girl... Mama Onion came to the table and sat herself across from me, waiting for me to finish my mango. The woman folded her aged hands on the table, watching me intently. She was enjoying this, and so was I. After I finished up, Mama smiled, sadly, "I have some things I need to discuss with you... It seems as though you've gotten our messages, since your here. Our universe needs help... A great evil is attacking it and only you can stop it."
"As I suspected," I replied.
"The Flying Poop... It has returned my love, and only you can put an end to its reign."